Sixty is the new 25

Published: March 11, 2014 at 7:51pm

Taking a leaf out of Michelle Muscat’s book, which says that you can Photoshop yourself into a magically more wonderful version of the real thing, half the size, with the complexion of an 18-year-old in a Lancome advertisement, with shiny hair and limpid eyes, as though you are some rarefied star who is never seen in real life, rather than a politician or a politician’s wife in little old Malta who is everywhere in public all the time, Marlene Mizzi has had some gifted wizards get to work on her campaign flyer picture.

And what do you know? Sixty is the new 25.

The reality is somewhat different, and whether she likes it or not, Mrs Mizzi should stick with it. Manifesting that level of insecurity about your appearance is a bad sign, not a good one. Nor is it feminist or progressive to make it clear that you wish to be assessed on your appearance and hate the fact that you are 60.

Can we even imagine Angel Merkel posing like that, fixating on what she looks like, or getting a studio alchemist to take three decades off her age while making her look completely different (better) to what she looked like at that age anyway?

No, it wouldn’t happen. And despite that – or because of it – Angel Merkel runs Germany. She runs Germany without giving a damn about what she looks like or manifesting gross insecurity about not being 25 or a show-stopper. She stops shows all right, but she doesn’t do it with hair and make-up…or Photoshop.

Marlene Mizzi's new MEP electoral flyer: 60 is the new 25.

Marlene Mizzi’s new MEP electoral flyer: 60 is the new 25.

The reality is somewhat different, as this current photograph shows. A kind friend should take this nice lady aside and let her know that it's time to let go of the hair and the 1970s blue eyeshadow and false eyelashes.

The reality is somewhat different, as this current photograph shows. A kind friend should take this nice lady aside and let her know that it’s time to let go of the hair and the 1970s blue eyeshadow and false eyelashes.

A very bad idea for a woman of 60, even if she is in perfect shape, let alone when she is not. If you are going to photoshop yourself into 25, then don't go out where people can see you, let alone to parties dressed like this, with full reality on display.

A very bad idea for a woman of 60, even if she is in perfect shape, let alone when she is not. If you are going to photoshop yourself into 25, then don’t go out where people can see you, let alone to parties dressed like this, with full reality on display.

When people see you walking in and out of your Valletta shop on a regular basis, it's pointless pretending that you look 25 (especially when you didn't look like that at 25 anyway). It's OK to be normal, Mrs Mizzi. It's OK to be 60. It happens to everyone, unless they pop off prematurely. So who cares?

When people see you walking in and out of your Valletta shop on a regular basis, it’s pointless pretending that you look 25 (especially when you didn’t look like that at 25 anyway). It’s OK to be normal, Mrs Mizzi. It’s OK to be 60. It happens to everyone, unless they pop off prematurely. So who cares?

"Aw Lily hi, ghandek xi toys, ha niehdu good time?"

“Aw Lily hi, ghandek xi toys, ha niehdu good time?”




27 Comments Comment

  1. H.P. Baxxter says:

    I think the government should issue calls for more volunteer helpers at the coming MEP elections.

    At this rate, half the voters will be going blind.

    • Grezz says:

      Sartorial comments on the above photos please.

      • H.P. Baxxter says:

        I don’t do ladies’ fashion.

        But I offer an express botox service, so Marlene can visit my clinic. Much better than Photoshop, and compatible with all viewers.

  2. P Shaw says:

    Is she competing with Miriam Dalli and desperate about being elected to the European Parliament? What an insult to women, just three days after women’s day.

    Give me the real and honest Helga Ellul anytime, with her talents, eloquence, authenticity, achievements, and pleasant personality. Vote for Mrs. Ellul.

  3. Harry Purdie says:

    Love it. In Canada, we call this a ‘buzzsaw attack’. Performed only on deserving victims.

  4. P Shaw says:

    At least two Photoshopped Marlenes will fit into the real one.

  5. Anthony says:

    Hemm ghalik?

    Certainly mhux ghalija after having seen those horrendous rear views.

    How fake.

  6. Nerd of Redhead says:

    In the first photo, she looks younger than her daughter.

  7. Nerd of Redhead says:

    An MEP should represent something that he is and not something that he’s not.

    Where are the real politicians these days? What’s happened to Malta?

  8. socrates says:

    Helga Ellul by far surpasses all the PL ‘ladies for MEP election’ cohort. She’s wise, they’re silly. She means business, they don’t. She’s honest, I don’t trust the others except on Carnival Day. She makes sense, the others are mirrors of PL nonsense.

  9. Gahan says:

    Is this some prank on Marlene Mizzi?

    [Daphne – No, it’s her official campaign flyer, straight from her office.]

  10. Neil says:

    PHWWOOOAARRRR!!!

    Ahem…..I’ll get me coat….

  11. Jozef says:

    Cos I’m worth it.

  12. Rita Camilleri says:

    When is she ever going to run out of that silver-blue eye shadow that was so fashionable in the 70s. I think she must have bought loads of it bil-bulk buying.

  13. Amanda says:

    I recently had the misfortune to catch up with some former colleagues over a drink – talk turned to politics as it always does in Malta and the Labour girls among us started discussing the lovely Marlene Mizzi – how stylish she is, how well dressed, so many different outfits etc.

    [Daphne – Marlene Mizzi is spectacularly badly dressed. She would make the worst dressed list in a nano second if this were not Malta. Her way of dressing is completely non-European. Her taste favours that peculiarly Maltese cross between Beirut circa 1990 and Moscow. I’ll stop there.]

    Not a word was said about her intelligence, political prowess or lack thereof – so I guess this flyer would be appealing to her sort of voters.

    On another note, she was once again so busy in the European Parliament that during the Strasbourg plenary session yesterday afternoon she was enjoying a long coffee in the bar with her daughter.

  14. Don Camillo says:

    Good going: four hours on Photoshop to make 35 years disappear.

    Oh mio signore, che falsita’.

  15. The Shadow says:

    Vecchia gallina fa buon brodo. This one will take a lot of simmering.

  16. Aunt Hetty says:

    There are ladies who age gracefully . Then, there are those like Ms Mizzi, in eternal competition with their own daughters.

    • H.P. Baxxter says:

      She’s in competition with Kristy Debono here. That’ll cause some confusion in the voting booth.

  17. gaetano pace says:

    Lucky I am past it at 65. Saves me the bother and problem of having her ever think of me as her toy boy.

  18. Lomax says:

    I really cannot understand what is wrong with being 60. I mean, why should one want to look younger? I am 36 and in spite of my fine lines, I really couldn’t care less about looking 25. Being 36 has its own plethora of advantages, particularly in the professional field so why worry?

    I really don’t know.

  19. Timon of Athens says:

    Oh dear, how could she wear a dress like that in the 2nd pic? Exposing her back and arms with all that saggy skin.

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