Will Silvio Parnis, minister for the south, be the main attraction – or is he being sidelined just in case he scares off tal-bizniss tas-sawt with his stupidities?

What about Sandro Chetcuti and Marlene Mizzi and Emmanuel Mallia tal-Labour Business Forum?

And he only saw one of them anyway, not at the time he claims he did, and they actually exchanged greetings.

Again, I suppose this is what Joseph means when he says that he’s going to turn Malta into a METTOKRAZIJA: people like Luciano Busuttil, who has the mind of a snail in the sun, will get positions of responsibility, based on the inverse meritocracy principle that it’s not what you know but who you know.

So will somebody please tell me what middle-aged, albeit thoroughly face-creamed, Jason Micallef is doing there? This gives new meaning to the panto-call ‘He’s right behind you!’

The Mile End Dwarf - he got his job on the basis of merit

Let’s have a competition, just for fun.

Who is writing the Mile End Dwarf’s letters to the press? It’s definitely not the Mile End Dwarf. This is not his grammar and syntax.

“It is pertinent to note that in his reaction…”: iva, dak Kurt, fuq kull sieq.

Most Maltese can’t pick up on the fact that ‘if’ is generally followed by the present tense, not the future or the conditional or whatever variant of those, and Kurt is definitely one of them.

People in the Labour Party who are capable of writing the last sentence of this letter are very, very few and far between. And before you say ‘Marisa Micallef’ – no, I think that’s wrong. This is almost certainly a man writing, not a Maltese woman. I just get that feeling. Marisa’s writing has always been very school-girly and like chewing-gum, stretching all over the place.

Edward Scicluna? He’s my best guess. But let’s have yours.

But first, a parting insult: A DIRECTOR OF COMMUNICATIONS WHO CAN’T EVEN WRITE HIS OWN LETTERS. P.A.T.H.E.T.I.C. How did he get the job? He’s the one who should be writing letters for people in the party, and not the other way round.

I suppose this what the man they call Joseph means by a METTOKRAZIJA: those who aren’t fit for the job still get it, depending on who they know.

My God, x’imbarrazz.

The Times, Letters to the Editor – Tuesday, May 15, 2012
by Kurt Farrugia,
director of communications, Labour Party, Ħamrun

Facts and ‘mud’

Reference is made to the news article Muscat Accused Of Mud-Slinging (May 14).

If Mr Grech sees these facts as “mud”, then we all have very good reason to be concerned about the way GonziPN is managing Malta.

Maria l-Maws: when he's not posturing on TV, he's asleep on the job.

Maltastar is running a sort of obituary for a horse-driver and regular at the Marsa tracks. The choice of words is very unfortunate.

Mario will always be remembered for his association with Swedish trotter Bisso As with whom he won many races including championships. Over the years he partnered many horses not only at the Marsa Racetrack but also during the feast races in the Gozo streets which he enjoyed so much.

And then some people would trust Evarist Bartolo to run state education, when he’s long been in charge of Maltastar as it goes from bad to lousy. But then he’s such a lazy so-and-so.

So the Fat Controller took up the subject of the law courts and justice this week on his Super One show. Justyne Caruana – that screeching harridan who looks like something completely different until she opens her mouth and lets rip – rang in with her comments.

The law courts in Gozo are not accessible to people with certain disabilities, she said. I’m not going to argue with her on that point, but I was gobsmacked by what came next.

Joe Grima nodded sagely and agreed with her on every point, until she dropped one on him.

“Int kieku per ezempju ma titlax il-qorti t’Ghawdex,” Justyne said to the Fat Controller. “Int ezempju haj ta’ persuna li ghalik il-qorti t’Ghawdex mhux accessibli.”

She was talking about his fabled girth, of course. But can you imagine? Embarrassment all round, except for Justyne, of course.

Fortunately, there’s a pharmacist right next door. And a supermarket opposite, which sells prunes.

Get out your brush and pan, Jason

Aren’t these the people with whom Jason Micallef and Super One have partnered up to hold Lovesexy festivals?

Jason, Quinton, Byon, Brandon, Charlon and the rest of the On brigade should get out with their Hoovers and their rubbish sacks and show how progressive they really are about dirt.

In The Times this morning:

Partygoers ‘leave a mess’

A group of St Paul’s Bay residents have expressed their “utter disgust” at the irresponsible behaviour of partygoers who attended a Love Sexy party at a Buġibba nightclub over the weekend.

Residents woke up to a big mess along the Qawra and Buġibba promenade as the gardens were littered with bottles, beer cans and, in many cases, smelling of urine. One of the light fittings was damaged, skips kicked open on the promenade’s pavement and bins overflowing with rubbish.

Outgoing Malta Enterprise chairman Alan Camilleri believes there is a correlation between the refusal of his agency to advertise in Malta Today and stories the newspaper published against him.

The case continues.