Baxx’s Reality Show?

Bring it on. The producers know where to find me.

Like the Poet said,
“Oh, I am so shameless,
I want to be famous.
This is a joyride and it’s my life.
Can’t help my desire,
I want to go higher, higher, higher.”

http://youtu.be/ZjHakXCgmys

Albona, I’m tending to agree with you on this one, although there are slobs on both sides [I won’t comment on the time I thought a chicken had been slaughtered] and, Daphne, I have had a variety of genders enter as I busied myself and never twitched so it’s good to know that ladies can handle the same situation just as calmly.

H.P. somebody should be following you around with a mic and a camcorder documenting this stuff for those leading less exciting existences.

Good one Baxxter. On Dragon’s Den on the BBC I vaguely remember the episode where some budding entrepreneur tried to sell a share in her company which manufactured these contraptions (essentially plastic penises) that women could use so that they didn’t have to sit down on some seat another woman’s shoes had just been on.

Let’s just say no investor was forthcoming.

So the other night I was having a few with me mate Spudkov, ogling the ladies and so forth, when I felt the urge to micturate. I sought out the gents, directed myself to the urinal, skipping over the puddles (oh yes, men are dirty pigs too) and was settling down to that state of bliss that only relaxation of the detrusor urinae can provide, when two ladies walked in.

I started, fumbling for my flies and about to issue an embarrassed apology, when it occurred to me that the mistake was on their side.

Putting on my best George Clooney voice, I therefore suggested the door opposite this one.

They just gave me a coy look.

Imagine my utter surprise and bewilderment when they both faced the wall-mounted porcelain and took out their manservant! I was bereft of words, denuded of a riposte, as I stood there on the tiled, urine-marinated floor.

For I had already fancied one!

I made my way back to the bar in daze tinged with rising nausea.

There is a lesson there for all of us chaps. Clean or not, germs or not, never let your guard down, for under the crinoline may lurk a giant Kraken.

Point taken on that one small area but that cannot justify the thousands of hours I have spent cleaning areas of the house other than the bathroom due to messy, unhygienic, inconsiderate, selfish females. I will fight my corner on this one as I have too much pent up anger to just be able to say I will let it go.

Oh yes, I forgot to mention that to top it off you can tell a man to clean up his mess but the minute you tell a woman to you are a chauvinistic pig.

Ah, the joys of being a man in 2013.