And another teacher friend actually told me the opposite, that they do not accept to add pupils as ‘friends’, until perhaps after they have left the school, if they so wish. Clearly a common standard needs to be set.

Wrong. I never insinuated that the girl was neglected – far from it! I am criticizing those who are saying just that.

You are a bitch of the highest caliber.

[Daphne – That’s what all people your age tell their parents (or the equivalent) who are doing their job; it’s the standard retort. To which the only proper parental response is: I’m not here to be your friend, or to say what you want to hear, or to be nice to you so that you like me; I’m here to make sure you grow up properly socialised. You are not my responsibility, and I am not your mother, but you are most certainly somebody’s responsibility, and I hope that your mother or father is telling you exactly this, for your sake. With every comment you make, you remind everyone how very vulnerable 15-year-olds are and how easy it is for a bad person to use somebody that age to his (or her, for that matter) own ends. The bad person needn’t even be older – he or she can be the same age. But in this case, he was much older and in a position of authority, making the mind-bending easier for him.]

Had the girl been neglected, she wouldn’t have been reported immediately. You are blind to the contradiction inherent in your statement.

Sadly, parents of children who are truly neglected, don’t even realise when their children don’t return home.

Daqt jaghmlu programm biex jaghmlulu gabra.

“Letting the authorities do their work” in their language means: ‘what’s wrong is not wrong, so stay out of it’.

Lulu, presumably you’re referring to the police investigation, but have you considered what “the authorities” should have done to prevent this happening in the first place?

Stewart Tanti held a supply teacher’s warrant. Whatever filtering controls and processes were in place – assuming there were any – allowed an unsuitable person to take on a position of trust involving direct contact with, and influence over, minor school children.

Whatever weaknesses there are in the system are not necessarily exceptional to Stewart Tanti’s case. Are there other tragedies waiting to happen because unsuitable people have escaped detection and are now teachers?

The ultimate safeguard is a person’s ability to understand his or her own shortcomings and to prevent any possible damage. Unsuitable people might be unaware of their own unsuitability for their teaching roles, which is why prospective teachers should be closely scrutinised AS PEOPLE, not just as holders of paper qualifications and field experience.

Doesn’t it concern you that there are children out there who may be at risk?

Letting “the authorities do their work” isn’t enough. “The authorities” DID do their work, and see what that’s led to. Whatever’s wrong with the system needs to be fixed. That can’t be done unless it’s openly discussed. And that means discussing everything, including Stewart Tanti’s case.

What a load of crap that is.

[Daphne – Not at all. This is a public discussion about a matter of public interest. Don’t see this tragedy in isolation. There are wide ramifications to it.]

[Daphne – Why would I bother writing it myself? This may be difficult for you to understand, but in the vast majority, people aged 49 do not reason like people aged 15. You must really have borne your late friend an enormous grudge – envy, perhaps, even if you won’t admit it to yourself? – to be championing with such dedication the man who killed her. I may not think like a 15-year-old anymore, but that doesn’t mean I don’t remember what 15-year-old girls can be like. And one trait is ambivalence towards their friends, even their best friends.]

However he was at school he has matured. God knows what our ministers did at school…Nobodys a Saint.

Let me just ask you one thing (keep in mind that I was best of friends with Lisa and had a good relationship with her father), posting these, likely false, comments and digging up, likely false, dirt on Erin is putting his family through as much hell as Lisa's family is going through. He is not classified as a perpetrator. I ask you one thing Daphne, as all these comments are making the matter worse, as everyone in our form today agreed (most between sobs), stop posting all this horrible things about Erin for now, let the investigation be concluded and the police come out with a final statement, then once we know the truth, post all you want.

Please do this for all Lisa's friends who can't focus on their O levels because they are thinking about what you are writing and to be honest, it's making a lot of 16 and 15 year olds burst into tears in class, you might think it's because of lisa's death….half of it is… but you are making it a lot worse for us all :(

[Daphne – Sadness has made you lose all sense of perspective. You are not crying because of what is being written here. You are crying because Lisa died and the teacher you admired killed her, directly or indirectly. You cannot admit that to yourselves so you choose to blame the messenger instead. This is normal. If you were to express your grief at home with the adults who look after you, instead of with other people your age who cannot, at the moment, see straight, they will tell you that it is what Erin Stewart Tanti did that was grossly wrong, independently of what you think about the manner in which that behaviour is being discussed here and elsewhere.]