They can ‘oblige’ all they want, I for one flatly refuse to further mangle my English.

Ewtanasja please.

You cannot enrich rubbish. And inverted commas are a non-starter. They’re used in every other language in the world for other purposes (sarcasm, innuendo, quotes).

There only one option for Maltese: euthanasia.

Maltese children are at a disadvantage because English isn’t their native language. The problem is further compounded by a limited English vocabulary and a difficulty in producing a correctly spelled stream of coherent text. This problem is easily noticable in blogs written by adults on local papers.

The irritating idea of spelling English words to Maltese pronunciation is going to confuse the issue even further. English words should be retained in their original English spelling and written within inverted commas while Maltese alternative words should be sought or created thus enriching the language.

Cepter 3 – Nitrennjaw

Mad-dawl taz-zerniq, jew forsi tubu tan-nejon, bexxaq ghajnejh bil-mod u stenbah. Idu malajr tharrket sabiex issib il-gisem townjat u slimm tal-mahbuba tieghu. Izda ma sab xejn.

Hares madwaru, u induna li kien l-isptar, fil-kexwilti wort. Imbaghad qam hesrem u kollox gie lura fi flexxbekk tremend – il-lejl ta’ mhabba passjonali, it-tiri, it-twerziq tal-mahbuba, il- karcejs frenetika madwar toroq u rawnebawts.

“Fl-ahhar qomt? Fittex hu l-brejkfast u x-xawer ghax ghandna bzonn is-sodda,” qal lehen jirbombja.

Kienet in-ners. Kien fiha ‘l fuq minn mitt kilò, ma nafx kemm jigu stowns, u mibnija qisha panzer.

“Int taf min jien jien? Jien il-min—”

Imma kienet digà telqet mill-wort, bil-karkur ikaxkar mal-art polixjata, biex tiddiskuti l-ahhar ajtim li xtrajt minn fuq ijbej ma’ shabha n-nersis.

Hares lejn genbu u stenna li jara l-ganxott wuwnt. Ma kien hemm xejn. Din ma stennihiex. Mela x’ra lbierah? Insomma kien ihobb jiehu s-saxejs tal-kecapp mieghu meta jmorru Berger Kink. U bil-fernezija ta’ mhabba ma bediex jaghraf jolly rubber minn kecapp hu u jiftah l-envilopps tal-enemilju bi snienu.

Insomma, l-aqwa li ma kellu xejn.

Anke l-Glock kienu tawulu lura.

Ha l-brejkfast (bajda skrembilt u kornflejks), ha xawer, u ihhowlsterja l-Glock.

Kellu donink rijalajzejxin li waqa’ ghan-nejk wahda u sewwa mal-partner.

Meta r-ra s-siluwett tal-hajert gunman ilbierah, ipprova jigri warajh imma wara hamsin metru kellu jieqaf b’nifsu maqtugh. Sadattant il-gunman kien et larc. Ma jistax ikun. Jehtieg li jittrennja.

Dakinhar stess beda. Libes ix-xorts, il-papocc tal-krosstrejnink, flokk tal-Hellihensin, u cempel lill-persinal trejner. Dak gie fuq il-bajsikil. Kien fit, mhux bhalu. Kardjo kemm jiflah, qallu.

U telqu. Bdew fuq is-sifrant. Hawn bdew sitt gimghat li fihom ir-rumanz sar mowxin bler wahda ta’ trejnink montaxx wara l-iehor. Bis-sawntrekk ejtiss, ovvjament.

Tum tum tum aj of di tajger…tum tum tuuu tuuu tumm. Beda jara l-ebs jixirfu mill-massa tax-xaham. Beda jhoss vivacità gdida kemm fizika kif ukoll psikosesswali. Il-pekks issudawlu. Kardjo, wejts, kardjo, ergajna wejts, naq’a krosstrejnink, u kardjo. Beda l-Muj Tajj. Kien qed isir baff u xreddit. U n-nies indunaw u kienu qed jghidulu, u n-nisa wkoll.

Baff u maco u hadd ma jista’ ghalih. Il-Glock kienet lest. Ghamlilha naqra frejm jisslajdja bhal tal-kxaxen. Ju tokin tu mi? Ju tokin tu mi? Daqqa ta’ drieghu u tohrog l-arma fuq l-islajd. Issa jaraw. Ma qaxxarx xaghru mowhok imma thajjar biex.

Someone yesterday uploaded a photo of a recipe book page on Facebook. The recipe called for “ajsingxugar (icing sugar)” – yes, with the English version in brackets.

Looks like you misspelt *mispelt. But that’s OK, l-aqwa li ftehemna.