This is exactly what happens when you promote friends of Joseph Muscat and Manuel Mallia rapidly through the ranks (what was it – three promotions in four weeks?) to have them become Instant Brigadier and Instant Deputy Commander.

This is also what happens when the President believes she can dispense with aides who know about form and procedure (not ‘etiquette’).

This has nothing to do with ‘royal etiquette’. This has to do with basic common sense. The welcome party waits on one side of the car and the more important person emerges first.

The queen and her husband do not exit from separate sides of the car but from the same side.

This should be obvious, and it’s tragic that everything has to be explained. They always exit from the same side BECAUSE THE WELCOME PARTY IS ONLY ON ONE SIDE OF THE CAR. YOU DO NOT HAVE SEPARATE WELCOME PARTIES ONE ON EACH SIDE OF THE CAR.

The exit car-door is always that nearest the building-door where the welcome party is meant to stand – and not the car-door furthest away from the door to the building.

The queen, being more important than her husband (she is the head of state) exits first and her husband follows. In this case, she could not exit first because nobody bothered to change the seating plan inside the car which was meant for the original plan of alighting in St George’s Square, Valletta, which would have put the queen (sitting behind the driver) next to the Palace door and ready to get out before her husband.

This country is full of the most unbelievable backwoods bunnies, but even this new excuse for President Coleiro’s ineptitude (and that of her officer) is far too much. They clearly thought – as do you – that the head of state should have got out of the car-door further away from the building-door and then trotted round the car to meet the others.

Unbelievable – just as unbelievable as the sight of President Coleiro trotting round the car twice: first to get to the wrong door and then back again. Tal-biki.

This happens because people don’t understand the basic principles which underpin these ‘sinifiteti’. Once you understand them, you don’t even need to consult your books, but just extrapolate from the basics.

Yes, that’s what I think happened.

I suspect that if the ceremony was held in St George’s Square as originally planned, then the Queen would have sat behind the driver, hence getting out in front of the Palace entrance.

However, due to the change of venue, no one bothered to work out that they needed to change the sitting order in the car accordingly.

Why do these things always have to be explained?

The Queen (or any other guest of honour/visiting dignitary) does not get out of that side of the car which necessitates him/her having to walk back round the car to her husband and half the receiving party.

The queen was SITTING on the wrong side of the car because nobody bothered to work out the details of which side she should have been briefed to sit on so as to be positioned to get out of the car first, before her husband.

Weep, Malta.