The Cowardly Custard retreats to his tent
Chicken Run Sant ran for shelter yesterday evening to a tent in Qormi and stood behind a business-breakfast podium to speak to a crowd of… better not say it.
He was safe and secure in the knowledge that here he was among admiring eyes who think of him as superior, after having seen the 1979 Harvard certificate that his friend Frans Sammut so kindly reproduced in his award-winning best-seller, ‘Alfred Sant: Vizjoni ta’ Bidla’ (Sensiela Kotba Socjalisti).
Jason and the Lion of Change having already frisked the gentlemen and searched the ladies’ handbags for the presence of a serious security threat called Jeffrey, the Cowardly Custard felt it was safe to proceed. Having fled to the Crosscraft set in the PBS studios when confronted by an angry dentist who is perfectly qualified to carry out the threat (which he didn’t make) ‘naqlaghlek snienek’, he now felt safe to say what was on his mind.
And this is what he said: he will only confront Jeffrey Pullicino Orlando in court and with his lawyer present. Funny, but I thought that his lawyer was present in the studio that day. I thought his lawyer is always stuck to his right hip. Isn’t Michael Falzon a lawyer? Yes, that’s right – he’s a lawyer who is employed by Bank of Valletta plc. He seems to have saved up quite a lot of vacation leave, or maybe he’s just taking unpaid leave. He would always do the right thing, of course. The deputy leader of the Labour Party would never sink to the level of the disgusting Nationalists and abuse of his position.
‘He expected to have an exchange of views with me, imma jien ma nitkellimx ma’ nies bhalu,’ Chicken Run Sant said. I apologise for using the vernacular, but it’s the only thing that seems appropriate here: ar’hemm, hej. Zutt! If they lived 200 years ago, Pullicino Orlando might have challenged Sant to a duel at dawn and our feathered friend would have run clucking away.
So let’s disabuse Big Bird of the notion that he needn’t engage in any exchange with Pullicino Orlando ever again. After this election, they’re both still going to be MPs, whichever side of the house they’re sitting on. In parliament, Sant can’t refuse to answer Pullicino Orlando’s questions. He is obliged to answer them. He forgets that Pullicino Orlando is neither a journalist who can be ignored nor a student who can be harassed.
‘Then what did he do? He went on television and cried,’ Henrietta the Hen said in a sarcastic voice. The crowd in his wigwam jeered. Labour – the party of unpleasantness. No wonder they end up with such ghastly leaders.
Michael Falzon lets off fireworks
Besides hunting in Romania, the Lion of Change (OK, I know it’s the lioness who hunts while the male sleeps, but if I call him a woman he’ll sue me again) has another hobby. ‘I have a licence to let off fireworks,’ he proudly told his interviewer.
The feast of Stella Maris parish in Sliema must be the most low-key festa in the entire Maltese calendar. The sorts of people who live in that neighbourhood are not the kind to follow the vara up the street and get drunk in the local hanut tat-te (there aren’t any).
But Falzon loves it, and he probably keeps it going singlehandedly, even though he now lives, famously, with a swimming-pool in L-Iklin (thank God for his feathered friend’s promise to halve the surcharge – you can really struggle on a BOV salary). I might be wrong, but he’s probably the only one behind that vara in August.
As he explained to his interviewer, he loves brass bands and fireworks. Along with hunting and santi tal-Madonna, these are his hobbies (and writing poy-ims, too).
So then I wondered whether this passion of his has anything to do with the fact that when the kowc tal-bidla – sorry, kowc tar-rebha – arrives in town, the cross vultures on board are greeted with loud, bright suffarelli.
It’s against the law to let them off in public like that, and there are always policemen around – but hell, what’s a little bit of law-breaking when you’re trying to set an example?
The Lion of Change is an intellectual
Michael Falzon told a recent interviewer that he writes poetry. You could picture her eyebrows going up, because he said, ‘Yes, really.’
Then one of the radio stations (I forget which, but it was probably Super One) broadcast one of his poy-ims. Here it is.
Morna fin-nort;
Morna fis-sawt.
Morna fl-east;
Morna fil-west.
Lejber is de best.
Some interesting passages from ‘The Moral Basis of a Backward Society’
The political scientist Edward C. Banfield wrote The Moral Basis of a Backward Society in 1958. He describes the people of a town in southern Italy, with emphasis on their political and social behaviour, showing how they were reluctant to cooperate or to maintain any kind of continuing relationship beyond those of the nuclear family.
Banfield argued that the people he studied behaved at all times as if they were following a rule which he called amoral familism, the guiding principle of which was to maximize the material gains and short-run advantage of the nuclear family, assuming always that all others will do the same. Those with no families he described as following a principle called amoral individualism.
Because of its relevance to Malta in 2008, I thought you might be interested in some passages from this study of southern Italy 50 years ago.
“The amoral familist who is an office-holder will take bribes when he can get away with it. But whether he takes bribes or not, it will be assumed by the society of amoral familists that he does.”
“In a society of amoral familists, the claim of any person or institution to be inspired by zeal for public rather than private advantage will be regarded as fraud.”
“The amoral familist will use his ballot to secure the greatest material gain in the short run. Although he may have decided views as to his long-run interest, his class interest, or the public interest, these will not affect his vote if the family’s short-run, material advantage is in any way involved.”
“The amoral familist will value gains accruing to the community only insofar as he and his are likely to share them. In fact, he will vote against measures which will help the community without helping him because, even though his position is unchanged in absolute terms, he considers himself worse off if his neighbours’ position changes for the better. Thus it may happen that measures which are of decided general benefit will provoke a protest vote from those who feel that they have not shared in them or have not shared in them sufficiently. In 1954, the Christian Democrat Party showed the voters of Basso that vast sums had been spent on local public works. Nevertheless, the vote went to the Communists. …It seems likely that the very effectiveness of the Christian Democratic propaganda may have helped to cause its defeat. Seeing what vast sums had been expended, the voters asked themselves: Who got it all? Why didn’t they give me my fair share? No amoral familist ever gets what he regards as his fair share.”
“In a society of amoral familists, the voter will place little confidence in the promises of the parties. He will be apt to use his ballot to pay for favours already received (assuming, of course, that more are in prospect) rather than for favours which are merely promised….The principle of paying for favours received rather than for ones merely promised gives a great advantage to the party in power, of course. In effect, however, it is often more than offset by another principle, as follows. In a society of amoral familists, it will be assumed that whatever group is in power is self-serving and corrupt. Hardly will an election be over before the voters will conclude that the new officials are enriching themselves at their expense and that they have no intention of keeping the promises they have made. Consequently, the self-serving voter will use his ballot to pay the incumbents not for benefits but for injuries, i.e. he will use it to administer punishment. Even though he has more to gain from this party than from any other, the voter will punish a party if he is confident that it will be elected despite his vote. The ballot being secret, he can indulge his taste for revenge (or justice) without incurring losses.”
Amen. It looks like we haven’t travelled very far in the last half a century: using our vote to teach the party in government a lesson but hoping it will be elected all the same, sulking because we haven’t got our fair share (and as Banfield points out, people like this never do get their fair share, no matter how much they get), keeping an eye on what the others are getting so that we can use our vote to break off their connections. Yes, yes, yes – but Banfield was writing about a hick town in southern Italy in 1958 – and here we are, still thinking and behaving the same way.
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I give up. Even though the PN are blameless in this, I’m sure, but the MLP have been handed victory by Vassallo’s allegations.
I thank Gonzi for all the energy and feel sorry for him that after all that work, the feathered opponent will come out on top.
Dear Daphne,
You might find this short episode rather amusing…You might be quite taken aback at the sheer ingenious creative thinking the new MLP can be capable of in tailoring sharp edged promotional acts aimed at catching our fantasies in voting the reds in again. The great strategic moves are happening all in the beautiful hazy on the brink of spring south…….
This morning taking my nephew and niece to school since my sister is recovering from a small operation, I found quite a circus awaiting us in front of the Tarxien Primary School.
Silvio Parnis his hair sculptured solid qieshu mrewwha lest ghal zifna bil-kostum fi Pjazza Repubblika, fresh as a daisy and looking very much delirious with excitement, was giving imitation red roses to all the mummies and grannies taking their kids to school!!!! I am quite sure he was living an internal George Clooney moment all by himself!!! I almost expected the E! news crew to emerge filming this red carpet event!Such a delirium of grandiosity as cheesy Silvio struck the pose, idiotic lampuka mejta eyes glazed in sucruse sweet matinee idol look and sang for his supper:
“U din ghalik sinjura…Int taf li jien qatt ma tlabtek xejn, izda haqqni nitolbok il-vot ghal nhar is-Sibt. Ahseb fija.”
All women were rather dazed and confused at such a demonstration of gallantry(many were caught without their best finery as track suits and leggings were quite the fashion that morning). Many thought it is St.Valentine all over again. Others thought its Jum il-Mara already!!! Others just appeared numb at the sheer stupidity of the act. Many commented on the cheapness of the Made in China red rose. Some children cried ghax riedu fjura ghat-teacher. Other mothers must have cringed at the idea of how to explain it to their jealous husbands….You do not skip such boundaries in the deep south. A rose is a rose, be it fresh from Kew Gardens or even if simply made of synthetic silk!!!
But the real nugget came as I proceeded to buy my papers from our local stationer, and I found 2 women with roses in their hands:
Woman 1:”U le ta imma dan genn!!! Inzied fl-imbarazz jonqosni! Kelli skoss flawer erengjmentz kollox tajjart ‘l hemm! Ara issa kif ser nghidlu lil Tony tieghi li Sylvio gieni bir-rose fejn l-skola!!!”
Woman 2: “Aw u kemm ihossu!!! Jien hassadni gie bil-fjura, madonna ghidt jigu bil-vidjow go wicci dalghodu hrigt qisni il-mignuna mid-dar! Mur fehmu li m’ghandhiex grazzja mieghu daqs kemm narah falz!U kif kien baqa bl-storja tad-dar tax-xiha li seraq?”
Woman 1: “U fejn naf! Xbajt nisma paroli miz-zewgt nahat! Aw ha nghidlek hu u Jason min jipozza l-aktar. L-ghoqda ta’ l-ingravata qisha daqs dinja t-tnejn li huma. Balla nejk.”
Woman 2:”Isma, helu hux dak li beka hemm tan-Nigret(Mistra?!?!?!?), u dak ta’ ghajnejh ta’ qattus, hemm ta’ Gonzi….”
Woman 1: “Jeffrey Pullicino Orlanndt? iii uzgur li gustuz!”
Parnis eat your heart out.
There is a high probability that on Election day it will rain.
Spare a thought for our disabled , bedridden and Nanna Olgas who are taken for a joy ride once in every five years (or 22 months?) to vote.Some of them feel important , but others couldn’t be bothered of what is happening around them..
I fully subscribe to Daphne’s vision of a society which allows its citizens unshackled access to public events like political press conferences. Quite honestly, I forgot the heated argument Daphne says we had. Not because it happened about, yupp, eighteen years ago, but because it must have been one of those ideas you entertain for a while and then drop. Certainly it is no mainstay of my political credo today.
True, it is a tad idealistic to believe in free access for all as described by Daphne but, hey, Im contesting an election on less than six hundred liri simply because I don’t want to lie when called to take the mandatory election spend oath( our law obliges candidates to spend only 600 liri on their campaigns. Who am I to criticise idealism in politics ?
In practical terms then, we’ve seen Xarabank work on a weekly basis. It proves that the principle can work if we want it to. The rest, security arrangements, sufficient space for these events etc, is all detail. Lets get on with it.
So Daf ,please, don’t keep whipping the man with ideas of his boyhood. Otherwise, this blog is even better than your column.
Georg
Georg,
I would trouble over da’ hood (childhood) of your ‘own’ children. As it stands you do not even seem to know that Sant and the MUT have been in discussions over the reception class for a good two years now.
Sandro Vella
Sandro,
Then why has the proposal been slammed as ridiculous by the MUT? Or have you been led to believe that these discussions have been underway for 2 years by Dr. Sant himself?
Good morning Matthew,
Not the point.
The point is that this issue has been discussed for the past two years and Georg (on Bondi+) said that as a caring parent he would know if an issue like this had been discussed or less.
The truth is that MUT has been discussing this issue for the past two years and even asked Alfred not to make it part of the electoral campaign and Bencini, in my opinion, was right. Alfred ignored him and he made his usual autogoals, that is why he is not capable of answering any question re: reception class.
Sandro
p.s. Thank you Daphne/Moderator for not censoring my post. This is the way it should be done.
[Moderator – ‘…been discussed or less.’ Or less what? No, thank you, for posting a somewhat intelligible comment. I normally wouldn’t be able to understand anything you’d have said.]
Hello Moderator,
You see. I do not consider myself an intelligent human being…..(ok, avoid comments please)
If this blog is just for intelligent people: you did not understand the concept of a blog.
A blog is an open discussion where people can learn from each others’ opinions avoiding insults leading to nowhere.
An opinion must be considered not destroyed at the first instance.
Never attended a brainstorming meeting?
Have a nice day,
Sandro
[Moderator – Sandro, I wrote intelligible, not intelligent. There is no opinion to ‘destroy’ if it cannot be communicated.]
Matthew, where on earth did you get the idea that “the (reception class) proposal been slammed as ridiculous by the MUT?” Net TV or In-Nazzjon?
All the MUT has said is that it needs more discussion.
Let’s put this to rest, shall we? In principle, a reception class is not a bad idea. It is a good one. That is why it already exists in Malta’s educational system.
The reception class proposal is another misprint except that this one has the potential to disrupt the lives of thousands of young children.
Dear Victor,
Neither.
Kind Regards!
To all the “undecided” people, and to all the people who have not as yet bothered to collect their voting documents:
Remember that by NOT voting, you are still having a say as to who will be the next prime minister.
Since the people who usually abstain from voting are generally pro-PN (or even simply anti-MLP) people, that means that Alfred Sant stands to gain by you not casting your vote (wisely, I must add), so please think it through carefully.
Put aside personal prejudices, and instead vote for the good of the country.
Having spent the first 20 years of my life under a Labour government, I am able to appreciate the relative calm, peace and prosperity we have enjoyed for the last few years, something which many “green”(and this word is being used here with a multitude of meanings …) 20-year-olds cannot appreciate today.
Recent tactics used and events orchestrated by the Labour and pro-Labour media (a term I am using very loosely) bring back a feeling of deja’ vu, and that’s not a good feeling at all.
USE YOUR VOTE WISELY, OR YOU MAY REGRET IT!
Coalition government is the solution, the dreamers are saying. A coalition usually takes place between parties that belong to a formal or informal alliance or at least between parties that share common ideals. AD has in the past repeatedly condemned every initiative by the PN government. The PN government did not find any support from the AD even on green issues such as the improvement of the Sant’ Antnin recycling plant. ‘OVER MY DEAD BODY’ said AD’s boss, remember? Now even personal problems are being blamed on the PN. This coalition mania even overwhelmed a subtle green columnist in her Sunday paper column who urged readers to ‘vote for a coalition’, now how on earth can the individual voter do that? Dreamers asking for the impossible!
[Moderator – the ‘coalition’ billboard in Msida reminds me of that scene in Rogue Trader when Ewan McGregor tries to sell a cappuccino which doesn’t exist. Or Phil Collins singing, ‘Jesus he knows me/…/And he knows I’m right’.]
As somebody once said at a pres conference in 1996, “the proof of the pudding …” … and we all know what THAT pudding tasted like, so let’s not have it again.
[Moderator – I believe that particular pudding tasted of ‘koxxox tat-tigiega… luncheon meat… u kunserva‘.]
Quote:
“The reception class proposal is another misprint except that this one has the potential to disrupt the lives of thousands of young children.”
And that won’t be the first time either, Ms.Vella.
Remember the education fiasco under MLP? The infamous 20 punt? Compulsory Arabic? I wonder where AS was at the time.
Why is it that labour always tinkers with a working system and turns it into the hopeless?
Of course the casualties that litter the wayside, a generation deprived of the opportunity to attend what they wanted (we have too many BA’s, sorry), are a forgotten footnote.
To all those voters who are undecided or who haven’t collected their voting documents, some of whom remember the 1972 election – to day’s situation is very similar to that one. Under Dr. G. Borg Olivier Malta had made great strides forward in many ways. Some people thought that changing the goverment would be a good move – we needed someone more dynamic. With just 5 votes we got it – with the ensuing consequences! Most of us went through hell while Labour supporters thought we were in Heaven! Meditate Gente! Meditate! but get those documents and vote wisely.
Moderator – We both slipped up: me for typing “press” as “pres”, and you for not noticing :)
Go on, Laiviera, gloat!
Loved the link, by the way … Looks like he likes red hot stuff!
Would you believe it?
MLP supporters (or maybe the elves disguised as floating voters) are claiming on the http://www.maltatoday.com.mt blog that Simon Spiteri nicknamed “It-tifel ta’ Lorry Sant” who is being accused for the corruption related to the Freeport scandal is:
1) A fervent nationalist
2) He hails from a staunching Nationalist family
3) He even has a PN emblem tattooed on his arm!
Yesterday they even claimed that they have secret information that the person being accused (funnily the same person whom they’re claiming is a Nationalist today, is innocent and that the culprit is a Nationalist Minister!
The elves are soon coming out with some more hot flash news… Lorry Sant was a Nationalist himself!
My God, Please forgive them as they don’t know what the hell they’re saying!
If you don’t believe me got to read yourself.
Victor
You need to stop reading l-orizzont!! All interested parties have said that the reception class issue is a non starter and damaging to our children.
I guess even Brother Martin of De La Salle said they need to discuss further eh??? I guess that what we saw on TV , ie Brother Martin denying Alfred Sant’s allegations that De la Salle have a reception class in force, is one of the famous ‘Montaturi’ that the Labour Leader labels anything not to his liking!!!
Get real my friend.
Dear Daphne,
first of all i’d like to say that i usually enjoy your columns…you write with a strong pen, and you write what you feel no matter what anyone else thinks.
But could you please explain to me why you, and other PN-afficionados (yes you are one too) insist on portraying Labourites (or Socialists) as ill-educated, ‘hammali’, savage, barbaric cavemen. As a former University student, i was appalled at the freedom of expression vacuum. Apparently it was ‘cool’ to be a PN supporter. A huge number MLP-leaning students did not beat their chests and publicly pledge their allegiance to MLP. Ax ninkixfu, ax jahsbuna hammalli, ax ituna stigma. Why? are we not all Maltese born on the same rock? Differing opinions are vital to a democratic society. Some people seem to think that because communism was an off-shoot of socialism, then MLP = Communism. The same people would do well to remember that former (far)-right (alumni include the Nazis…anyone remember them?
Do we have to keep mentioning the 60s, 70s,80s and 90s? If we must then, to quote (a rarity for me) a certain man by the name of Jesus: he who hath no sin cast the first stone…can we stop this BS please. those were different times under different circumstances.
On a final note; Daphne, my mother is a nazzjonalista, as is her entire family (my cousins,uncles and grandparents). My father (who was born and raised in Sliema, and won a scholarship to study in London as a youth, not that this should matter, but apparently it does) is a ‘Socjalist’. Does that mean my father is a barbaric caveman?
Forza Malta (oops sorry i used a maltese word…am i a hamallu too now?)
[Moderator – Would you like some chips with that shoulder?]
Dear Jonathan
Jesus also said : You see the mote which is in your brother’s eye; but you do not see the beam which is in your own eye.
Have you forgotten Charles Mangion stating ” that Nationalist’s have something wrong with their DNA.
And good old George Vella calling University Students and even their parents Hamalli , psataz etc simply because they showed their disapproval at a man who never answers a question and never admits a mistake!!
The same man who lied his way into power in 96 and the man who would have kept us out of the EU? The man with NO REGRETS!!
Get real
It always amuses me how one side cannot see their own faults.
George Vella was out of line but justified in my opinion. Yes students should be free to voice their opinions but you should show a potential prime minister in waiting some respect. You do not boo him for mentioning cancer.
And speaking of unanswered questions: did Gonzi reply to the proof that Jeffrey Pullicino Orland blatantly lied? crocodile tears anyone?
this is what is wrong with maltese politics…double standards.
Dr Gonzi, as any sensible Prime Minister would do, has referred the case to the relevant authorities . Of course Sant would have whipped out his Sherlock Holmes hat and magnifying glass and solved the case himself. Like he is doing right now about the Charles Mangion and Karmenu Vella case- NOT. But once again this is a MONTATURA by the big bad Nationalists, those of bad DNA!
Sant won 96 on bad promises and accusations of corruption yet in his thankfully short legislature what did he do about it— ZILCH, NADA, RIEN, NIENTE, XEJN!?
And as regards respect to a prime minister in waiting you have got to be kidding. How do you how respect to a man who mocks the actual Prime Minister. Remember Birzebugia… DR Goooooooonzi etc.
exactly my point…BOTH parties are guilty of mud-slinging…neither one is holier-than-thou.
and again, amazingly, the question has been evaded. Did Gonzi lie? simple question. yes, or no. this has nothing 2 do with party loyalties…it’s black on white and Pn should have the balls to say it. don’t mock Dr Sant (yes he has a DR too) for not admitting he made a mistake re Europe until Dr Gonzipn admits Jeffrey Pullicino Orland lied too.
whatever, neither party is the personification of evil. neither party is perfection either. my point is to ppl from both sides to realise that.
and how come any nationalists i meet don’t even deny the corruption charges…they just say, oh well, yes PN are very corrupt, but they gave us Europe, the Euro, and Mater Dejn (sorry Dei) ? so r we sayign corruption is justified? a small price to pay for a good government? all politicians are corrupt so just accept it??
I actually like Dr Gonzi. I do. he seems genuine and understanding and politically flexible and a good leader of a nation. much better than fenech adami. This is why i’m sorry for him that he has a cabinet of corrupt ministers ax mux tort tieghu.
now answer my post with a totally irrelavant topic is-soltu. evasion not confrontation.
[Moderator – Jonathan, you are comparing the issue of European Union membership to a disco.]
and another thing:
why do nazzjonalisti appear shocked when MLP uncovers these corruption cases. not in a ‘x gharukaza ministru korott way’, but rather, unbelievably, in a “x wicc tost ghadnu il-Lbaour li kixef ministru korrot. hallieh miskin ikun korrott!” . the temerity of it all.
The MLP uncovered corruption cases, eh? As far as has been seen till now, they have made accusations.
Jonathan
You say both parties are guilty of mud slinging. I’ll have to correct you on that one. All Sant and his deputies have given the electorate during this campaign is one message : Korruzzjoni ,Korruzzjoni,Korruzzjoni!!! Slinging mud at all and sundry. Have you heard Gonzi slinging mud at anyone? Gonzi gives out a positive message that together we can make it. Yes he criticises Sant on his past performance and his ‘new’proposals as any decent politician is obliged to do.
All Labour can do is be negative and harp on about stagnar, gholi tal-hajja, korruzzjoni etc.
Stagnar??? You have got to be kidding.
Gholi tal-hajja. Do you really believe Sant can ever control prices. How will he manage that ? Tell foreign manufacturers to give Malta a special discount? For example lets say Gillette decide to raise the price of all their products by 10%. How will Sant prevent the prices of Gillette in Malta by going up by 10 %??? Impose a price freeze, subsidise the increase, or maybe go back to the Bulk buying sytem. One brand one price no choice?
Jonathan, corruption is something that will always be present, as man is prone to corruption. So far despite Sant’s allegations no Minister has been found guilty of corruption even during those famous 22 months in office.To say that Gonzi stands still while corruption flourishes is a blatant lie. All cases of alleged corruption were referred to the relevant authorities and action taken when guilt was established: ADT, Malta Maritime etc.
I don’t know how old you are but I am of the age where I remember the cronies of Labour ministers taking money in exchange for all sorts of things ranging from a colour TV (Grundig only) to an import licence to a Job to a buiding permit.
I remember the good old days where the police were there to strike fear into people of different political beliefs
I remember Toto, Fusellu, Qahbu Qattus Pupa etc who ran amock, doing what they wanted without fear of arrest.
Where was the Crusader against corruption then???
Do you know that members of Labour who were already active in those corrupt times are still active now. None of them ever protested against the heavy armed tactics of the Socialist regime and the police. Why does Sant keep them on ?????
No Jonathan, I hardly think that both parties are the same.
Poor Harry.
His company has not filed any finacial statments with the MFSA from 1991. This means that the penalties that he will have to pay will most probably also run in five digit figures. He’d better start putting his house in order before preaching.
There is no alternative to PN