Toni wants to sell pistachios
Toni Abela was interviewed by Malta Today (it’s in today’s edition) and came up with a brilliant plan to raise funds for the near-bankrupt Labour Party. Right. Hold your breath. He thinks Labour supermarkets for Labour supporters will be an amazingly good idea.
“If we have a market of 200,000 Labourites….the party can become a provider of services and commodities,” he told his interviewer. And supermarkets? “Why not? Why shouldn’t a political party fare as well as a private operator does when they open a shop? I want our supporters to become stakeholders in this operation. I am saying that what others can do, we can do better.” So not just a Labour supermarket then, but a Labour supermarket with shares sold to Labour supporters.
What can I say? I’m speechless (very unusual). The man knows nothing about business, and probably even less about running a political party. Now he wants to sell nuts to raise funds to pay for Super One. He doesn’t even know that you can’t plunder the revenue of a limited liability company to finance the operations of something else altogether, otherwise you’ll end up like the most notorious supermarket of all, Price Club.
A business is a business, Toni. You run it as a going concern driven by the profit motive, not as a fund-raising exercise to keep a political party’s television afloat and to pay the secretary-general’s salary to keep him in white pants and beige suits for funerals.
And to think that 140,000+ people voted for this bunch of no-hopers to run the country. Dear God, what a narrow escape we had.
Toni Abela isn’t going to stand for election to parliament. Oh no. He’s just going to stand for election as deputy leader, so that he can implement his plans for a Labour supermarket that will continue to polarise the nation and bankrupt the party. You don’t have to be in parliament to change the world, he told Malta Today, citing the example of Mahatma Gandhi and Martin Luther King. Well, what a t**ser. Not only does he know nothing about business and the management of political parties, but he knows even less about history. The very two people he mentioned couldn’t even have been elected to parliament (or the US equivalent) if they wanted to. They were both fighting for civil rights and for autonomy for their people, because they didn’t have either.
The man’s embarrassing, but what is even more cringe-making than his idiotic utterances is Malta Today’s description of him as:
A freethinking intellectual with a pugnacious sense of humour, a prolific writer and an orator of no mean thespian skill, he might have been Malta’s closest equivalent to Roberto Benigni, had he not chosen politics as his calling.
Roberto Benigni – that skinny little Italian court jester with the ‘I trip and you laugh’ sense of humour – leaves me stone cold except for the overwhelming desire to get on a steam-roller and mow him flat. But even I can see that he’s about as similar to Toni Abela as Roman Abramovic’s business sense is to Toni’s. Freethinking intellectual? Pugnacious sense of humour? How about crass sense of humour? And he is a prolific writer, yes – of vulgar innuendos and inane articles for L-orizzont. Very impressive. As for his oratorical and thespian skills, whenever I see him hard at work on Super One, I always think how well he would have done in one of those touring circuses that put on miracle plays for the peasants in the Middle Ages, all exaggerated movements, simple jokes and deliberate pronunciation.
65 Comments Comment
Leave a Comment
Was it Karl Schembri who wrote the interview as it sounds like him. His description of the Roberto Benigni performance is similarly effusive. But to compare it to Toni Abela is over the top.
[Moderator – It was James Debono. When people tend to be so gushing about what they perceive to be high culture it tends to have the opposite effect on me. Culture is like jam: the less you’ve got, the more you spread it.]
Moderator, I couldn’t agree more. Very unexpected from JD who is usually a model of restraint especially on environmental issues.
So Toni thinks that Labour can make a success of a supermarket venture. Labour could not even make a success of a much simpler travel agency business and had to close it down whilst the PN Eurotours still strive. With free advertising on their media they still could not get it runnnign profitably as they just could not deliver the quality!
And now Toni wants to run a supermarket. Lidl are trembling!
Stick to the knitting Toni. Labour should do good politics and get elected. That what they exist for! Rather than dream of supermarkets stop badmouthing George Abela who is the only one who can get you there.
Toni would be better suited (excuse the pun!) trailing the beaches with a large wicker basket selling roasted peanuts …
(With no offence meant to the man I remember selling nuts at Ferro Bay around 35 years ago, who is still doing the rounds with his enormous wicker basket full of peanuts, though at Mellieha Bay.)
Prosit Tony. Good idea really. Remember however that you would not have been able to realise your dream just 20 years ago with all that red tape your same party ahd brought about.
An 80s Nostalgia Supermarket? Brilliant!!! Tower Tea and Pepsodent! Catch, Husky and Mini-Mint! Krips and Mary Spiteri Cassettes! DVD Collectors’ Editions of “Eileen Montesin and Richie” (can’t remember the proper name of the programme, sorry).
The last time MLP had a go at setting up a supermarket was when they were in government, to make sure the thing would work, they set up a new and badly laid out building in Floriana – out of ready reach to everyone – then to assure its success, they put a stop to private importation and introduced bulk-buying, Diserta chocolate, homemade toothpaste.
To reduce the cost of living, government closed down the Valletta market, compelling Valletta residents to take a special bus – at suitable charge and with considerable waste of time and inconvenience – to purchase their needs from the supermarket at Floriana.
And to further improve the supemarket’s prospect of success, government got Gozo Channel to run regular trips to Sicily where people could buy all manner of seconds and discarded goods of superior quality to what the supermarket sold.
Mela insejtom ic-cuccati li kontu tghamlu l-hin kollu dak iz-zmien, Ton. Tistghu ttellghu ‘Leaders’ u ‘Deputy Leaders’ ghaliex jekk dawn, u l-partit taghkom kollu, mhux lesti jiskuzaw ruhom b’mod carissimu, hekk kif jilhqu l-kariga, ghal-hsara li l-MLP ghamel lil Maltin u lil-pajjizhom tul is-16 l-sena’ li ghamel fil-Gvern, l-MLP qatt mhu ser ikun kredibbli.
Kieli – I had forgotten about that supermarket! It was in Belt is-Sebh (what a name!), if I am not mistaken.
P Portelli also mentioned a failed attempt at a Labour travel agency. Has anybody got any idea which that one was? How could they compete with Norman Hamilton, anyway, having made him a household name themselves?
Business strategy my left toe! Imagine them running the country again …
Intellectual,orator,sense of humour, Benigni, supermarkets. Which Toni Abela are we talking about? I know it is past midnight and maybe I should be in bed at my age. Has everybody in Malta gone mad since the election ? Or maybe having just received my Kartanzjan I should keep my big mouth shut and go to bed at 8pm. The mind boggles. I hope it is not Alzheimer’s setting in. Toni Abela u Benigni. U Giezu Giez. Mela la morna morna. And now off to bed.
HP Baxxter – “Eileen Montesin and Ritchie” was probably “Bixkilla Ward u Zahar”
I recall that sometime in the early eighties, the Labour administration moved the Valletta market to Floriana and named it “Ixtri Malti” – literally, “bribe a Maltese”.
@Amanda – it was Norman Hamilton who ran the Labour travel agency, Sunrise Tours. When it closed down, he set up his own successful operation.
@Leonard – Ixtri Malti! Oh God, I remember that – what a trip down memory lane. And those green packets of Tower Tea….
If I’m not mistaken, Norman Hamilton took over Sunrise at a knockdown price then developing it into Hamilton Travel
sorry Daphne, I claim the right to use the word Tosser in your blog. I used it first, so please dont use it without my express permission. It can only be used to describe members of the MLP or Pn or anyone else who has an over hyper inflated sense of his own ego, and reinforces it by setting up websites singing paens of praise to him/her over the ether. It can be used to descibe persons who dont look before they leap in writing terms, to those who dont have a miror at home, and to the poor souls who should know better. Hold on. That means the whole bloody population, yours truly included. God ! are we all F**king Tossers then?
Hey, someone should issue a health warning about this blog/comments. I nearly choked to death on a Peanut ( not from a labour supermarket as it had not yet expired) whilst reading these comments. After a labour supermarket they will come up with novel ideas of how to get back into power….. you know stuff like they need an english language daily which toes their line, state subsidies for travel agencies in the red,socialist indoctrination at school, bring back the Brigata etc. The pjan ghal bidu gdid is being unfolded day by day, its like watching some cheap brazilian telenovela
Talking of supermarkets. Take this as a shopping list
Repeater class
Promise to dismantle something already gone – Gozo incinerator
DNA
Wrong numbers on number of new voters
VAT U-turn
EU U-turn
Spelling mistakes – “due to a computer fault”
Just a million from the EU
Successive electoral defeats
Hanky Panky on internal party matters
Insults to University students from Zejtun
Could you please update the list……………….
And please, these are the same who would like to “manage” Malta. Forget it Joe et co.
I’ve been thinking about my idea, and by golly, I’m convinced I’m on to something here. Forget the MLP bit. But an 80s Nostalgia Shop! It would be brilliant. A cult hit. We’ve got (at least) the 25-40 age bracket who’ve lived through the momentous years from 1972 to 1987 (which became even more “cult” towards the end). So the market’s there. And these are the people most likely to get hooked onto a Cult Item. And with cult items, you can set your own price.
Daphne, you’re the one with the marketing brains around here (I couldn’t market myself if my life depended on it). It’s in your hands now. Let’s turn this into a joint venture, and let’s make some dosh, I say! Yay!
@H.P. Baxxter
Love your idea! May I suggest including an adult, sado-maso section where you may buy (strictly for adult fun only) toy tear-gas, batons, shields, semi-automatic shotguns, etc….
Daphne – OK, thanks.
Joseph – Talking of hanky panky, one particular Labour MP comes to mind, with his daily visits to a female neighbour, even at the height of the electoral campaign. The funny thing is, he apparently left his wife because of an affair with his secretary or whatever, and seems to have another thing going on (concurrently) in my neighbourhood. And this man isn’t even in the slightest bit attractive …
H P Baxxter – Stickers re the schools crisis, Sanga tennis shoes, a ban on coloured socks (sell only white, beige and grey) …
Ful, cicri u karawet,
ton taz-zejt u kunserva tal bulk buying
Cikkulata Deserta.
Seems a long time ago,remember? But sh*t, these people don’t change. True what you have said, Daphne, we did have a lucky close escape.
@ amrio
And T-shirts! We forgot the T shirts! I still remember my white vest-like thing emblazoned with Isard du Pont’s image. Why not a full 80s clothing line, while we’re at it? A neutral-grey North Korea style jacket (which kept me warm through those years Taht iz-Zero), a pair of Sanga running shoes (which promptly fell apart as soon as you left the shop). And of course, in the lingerie section, Abanderado Y-fronts.
Damn it amrio, I had bugger all back then, but I was happy. Perhaps I’m growing old. Too old for my own good.
What say you, Daphne? Might I press you for a consoling thought?
Reference Blog number 12 of 05th May at 0830hrs
Daphne, please try and get your facts right before rushing into print. Sunrise Tours was a direct competitor to Hamilton Travel which meant that I did not run it and did not set up my operation when it closed down. Hamilton Travel Co. Ltd. was set up in 1992. In 1998 the Malta Labour Party approached me and asked me to try and salvage Sunrise Tours by running it for a year. The response was poor and my company handed Sunrise Tours back to the Malta Labour Party after only six months. Incidentally, since you seem to be so interested in my company perhaps you would care to join one of our tours next Summer. May I recommend the Sicily tour which includes a great whole day excursion to Mount Etna.
Although Toni Abela’s suggestion is admittedly slightly ludicrous, it is amazing what such a fine memory the nationalists have of the 1971-87 years. Is that all you think about nowadays? I thought you would all be crowing over 4 years in the EU or the gigantic dupe of Smart City just around the corner. But with dear old GonziPN now indicating that the much lauded 25 per cent tax band will have to wait, we could be facing at least 4000 new unemployed when ST and Malta Shipyards close down at the end of the year. Better some deserta and catch after all.
Regarding LIDL, it is a real mess of a supermarket with half empty shelves and a lot of queer products that look pretty much like deserta and Pepsodent.
[Moderator – And the logo looks like it was designed by Toni Abela himself.]
And what about the whole array of loss making GWU companies……I bet that without the windfall from National Cargo, the Big Boys are having super human challenges massaging the figures.God Save Untours Insurance.
Supermarkets!The way to go Toni….just when I think it can’t get any worse..someone takes the time to prove me wrong.
@Norman Hamilton – I’m not particularly interested in your company, but I do admire the fact that you have made such a success of it. Thank you for clearing up the facts. Perhaps you could let Toni know that a Labour supermarket is not such a hot idea….
@Mcomb
You know what? You’re right, in a way. Thing is, it’s so easy to take today’s successes (some of which you mentioned) for granted. It’s when we are reminded of the way we were (note aeons ago, only a few years ago) that maybe
1. we appreciate more what we have acquired in the last 20 years or so.
2. put what some (especially) Labour leaders are saying into perspective
As to tax bands, whilst it now seems that Gonzi was teeny-weeny rashful when he promised tax cuts almost a year in advance, he is NOT saying that tax cuts will surely not be into effect next Autumn.
As regards ST and Dockyard, I don’t know where you got that information. Can you please explain?
McComb, matey, I couldn’t give a rat’s arse about Smart@Whatever, since I left that accursed rock long ago, but I’ve lived among some ex-Eastern Bloc “Ewropej ta’ Abel”, and I realised we’ve been lied to all our lives. Oh yes McComb. They had everything, and they grew up normally, while I grew up in the third god damned sodding world, that’s what. Now bugger off. If Malta is in a mess right now, and it could very well be, you might consider for a moment that it’s well nigh impossible to make up for those twenty years and catch up with the rest. Damn you, Malta, damn you to hell. There, I’ve said it. I hate my country for making me what I am today.
I can’t folllow the joke about Mt Etna. I wish that Norman Hamilton,Anthony Licari or Frans Sammut may give me some gen about what they are on about.Or possibly Daphne .
WOW … WOW ….. reading the posts here is enlightenment and is helping me to understand why some people cannot differ ‘living’ from ‘existing’.
No wonder, that most negative feelings are stronger then positive ones.Norman’s ‘Etna invitation’ and Daphne’s response are covered with negative feelings, that certainly would carry any person beyond the line of no return.
Ha Ha Ha .. How amusing!!!
@ H P Baxter 70’s 80’s Nostalgia shop. In East Berlin there is a museum which shows a typical East German apartment under communist rule. Yep we really could have something similar here complete with Grundig TV, screening “Bongu Malta Socjalista”, phone with crossed lines, underground classroom, video of “Raid on Entebbe” copied and smuggled since it was banned during Mintoff’s regime, oh yes and possibly fertiliser which was a donation from North Korea , and was so toxic that it ruined the water table in the south of Malta
it really irks me that MLCP and JM are proud of Labour’s past ( the latter wants to doucment it in his 15 year plan)
Have a look at this little gem from Saviour Balzan’s interview with Toni Abela, talking about the Middle East:
Incredible. I was just holding myself off from making a politically incorrect comment about the resemblance between Toni Abela and Manuel from Fawlty Towers, and there he goes and makes one about Arafat. Can anyone imagine meeting Barack Obama and then saying, “Oh, he’s not as black as I expected.”
And someone should let this ‘freethinking intellectual’ know that Jihad is not a political party, but Fatah and Hamas are. It follows that all Toni Abela should have to say about Arafat has to do with the colour of his skin, considering that he doesn’t even know the name of Arafat’s party.
And what’s with the paradox in his last sentence? ‘If there is peace there won’t be peace’ – what? Does he know what a paradox is?
@ DCG
You admire “the fact that you have made such a success of it”.
I, on the other hand, admire the gall with which some people will always try to make a cheap advert……
@Charles Buttigieg – there was no innuendo in Mount Etna; it was a straightforward suggestion.
@my name is Leonard…
Wrong. “Ixtri Malti” was the name given to the market building at Valletta when re-opened after it was gutted and laid out anew.
That was another classic case of in-depth Socialist thinking and planning. Shutting down a popular and useful public amenity of long years standing, then re-doing the shop but completely failing to realise that, at best there has never been much [prodott] Malti to sell…and even less so after years of MLP interference in the business sector. The ‘Ixtri Malti’ project was dead even before it was started.
During the 60s there was the beat generation followed by the hippie generation. More recently we’ve had the internet generation and the MTV generation. The Deserta generation falls somewhere in between. But it wasn’t all doom and gloom. There were some funny moments, even if the humour was not intentional. I recall a shot of some girls on stage singing “il-quddiem fis-sliem” while marching backwards. @ H P Baxter – perhaps you can include a mechanized version in your nostalgia museum/shop.
@My name is Leonard but (phew what a long pseudonym) my son calls me Joey –
I’m looking into it, but we’ll certainly have scale models of HMS Brazen and replica Royal Navy hats, as worn by Alex Sciberras Trigona. Cripes, whatever happened to him?
[Moderator – He married into the pepe.]
@H.P. Baxxter. It’s ok, you can call me Leonard.
@H.P. Baxxter
AST is part of CNI (or whatever those group of old nitwits headed by KMB) are called. At least, he appears in Smash TV with him and Eddie Privitera….
Spaeking of AST, the other AST(Assocjani Sportiva Tigne) was one of the only marvellous aspects I remember from THOSE times. Anyone of you used to be part of that scene (wonderful times, most of the Maltese bands used to have a rehearsal garage there)?
On a slightly different note, has anyone watched JM on Realta tonight? I got the creeps watching, he didn’t look at our journalist friend, just straight at the camera….
@Moderator – AST is very tal-pepe himself.
Matthew – Look on the bright side: at least Toni Abela didn’t comment on Arafat’s lack of height. Well he probably wouldn’t have noticed it anyway, given that he’s barely 5′ 4″ tall himself!
The 80’s, what a trip down memory lane!!! Does anyone remember going up on army trucks during the bus strike? I distinctly remember climbing those trucks on a Saturday night dressed up in a frilly white shirt with shoulder pads “Alexis Carrington” style and a black pencil skirt with a slit at the back for a night out! I even attended discos at the Phoenicia where Mr Hamilton was the residen DJ. “They were the best of times. They were the worst of times.” ~ Charles Dickens
Vanni – Arana kollha sejrin Sqallija ma’ Norman u grupp ta’ Laburisti! You must be joking! (But you’re right about the “cheap advert” bit.)
amrio – With his Hilary Clinton fake smile?
@ amrio
re JM
I was walking in Valletta and a taxi was blaring Super One. JM’s voice gave me the hebejeebies. His tone is smug. AAAarrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhh. He put me off my studies hehe
@ Amanda
At least Hillary Clinton is no apple-polisher like the Poodle, and no weather vane either. I am no fan of her for many reasons but I can’t say she doesn’t stick to her guns in spite of the opposition. As for JM, he has a stack of apples to polish for his teacher and Mentor (we all know who this is), and is his weather vane spins furiously… As for the guns, well one has to have the goolies to know how to stick to them… Me off to bury my nose in books and stuff. Ta ta, amrio.
@amrio
I did watch about 10minutes of Realta with JM last night, and you’re right he was staring at the camera, trying to look serious and managerial. What was that about? He looked really artificial, trying to impress.
In his favour he spoke well about the introduction of divorce.
@ amrio Though I confess I RARELY watch any local TV Station, yesterday I spent about 5 to 8 minutes watching Joseph Muscat, as you said you did.
I won’t comment on your silly remark because I found it much more interesting Joseph’s readiness even to embrace Daphne! It is great to find a politician with some of sense of humour.
I agree with you that what he said about divorce makes sense and the way he would deal with that hot subject, was really interesting.
@Peter
A prospective leader who is as stiff as a pole when interviewed does not induce any trust on his capabilities, no matter how young and inexperienced he may be.
I did not mention JM’s comment about divorce, Adrian did, but I agree that at least, a prospective leader is willing to freely discuss this issue.
I also liked the way he spoke about Labour Party being an opposition that not only criticises when due, but also puts forward new constructive ideas. Let’s hope that whoever will be the new leader will follow his line of thought; that will be a first for Malta.
Probably our Toni, thought he was having one of those Eureka moments and he was going to solve the labour party’s financial problems. What an fool!
With people of Toni’s ilk in Government, we will go back to having the state run supermarkets, factories, banks, hotels etc.
Amrio, regarding ST, you only have to read last Thursday’s Times Business front page story to get a feel of the situation they are in. Regarding MS, I cannot in all honesty see how cowboy Austin ‘Abdullah’ Gatt can keep the yards open when they are losing Lm 10 mn a year without a state subsidy. Perhaps they might re-absorb the workforce into govt depts like they did with IPSL excercise – another typical PN failure only marginally better than the much derided Labour corps of the 70’s and 80’s.
I have to agree with all of you on JM’s performance on Smash TV, his staring at the camera made him look like a complete nitwit who hasen’t ever appeared on TV. Even AS (who is the last person you would call telegenic) used to do better than him.
And Amrio, those were heady times indeed. Now Tigne’ has been given over to the mega magnate who would be willing to pour concrete over all Malta. You know what the result has been.
@Mcomb
Agree about Tigne. From a centre of creativity (in all senses of the word – God knows how many groups, ideas, nd babies were conceived there!) to what now seems to be a huge slum area. I always pass near the place with a heavy heart.
Ronnie – The bank was not just state-run in Labour days – The private banks were first forcefully taken over from the shareholders by the then Labour government . No compensation has been given to any of them to date.
@ Amanda – agree 100% with you. I would also add that state-run companies were, and to some extent are still being, used as employment agencies for the party faithful and well-connected. The State has no business running enterprises.
In my opinion the State should focus on 3 main areas; tax-collection, regulation and security; anything else should be left to the private sector.
May I share with the ‘clever’ Maltese citizens a typical Noti-mhawwad-Abela-Malta-Lablab-SuperParty-hampers special offers, which won’t sell for the cheap price of a pistachio packet:
Anglu Farrugia selling pitazzi full of lovely pictures, showing angry Labour Party supporters hurling abuse at the Malta Loosers Party.
Evarist Bartolo (in tal-Muzew fashion mode) narrating stories about his ex beloved leader and guru Alfred Silent Sant.
Marie Louise Coleiro(ooooh) roaming around like Sandy Shaw selling her marvellous ideas to small kinder children wandering among market stalls.
Michael Falzon the Eurostar Singer, with his unique non-Pavarotti funny vocal sounds, entertaining toddlers in the playing red-carpeted area.
George Abela, who is allowed entry on condition he leaves his newly embraced supremo supporter Dom-forgotten-by-many-including-labour Mintoff, alone, far away from the last contender, the mighty short chap!
And here he goes, the know-it-all Joseph-bravissimo-Muscatino, ‘coi fiocchi’, an ‘alter Alfredus Santus’ (not ‘sanctus’), tieless, with browny-tipped legs, where ‘certain heights’ (physical and metaphysical) are merely impossible: the pre-destined guru for the undemocratic lot who are still abusing power from within.
Just a word about prices for above items: non-convertible to euros, funnily showing together a force of inseparable unity within the splittest socialist group on planet earth, peculiarly waving to people without being able to smile at each other…until 5th June 2008, their FATAL FREEFALL…with one undesirable exception.
Good luck to the poor buyers. The sellers are poorer (in mind and style).
El Karkariz. But where shall you put Jason ‘il-peacock’ Micallef? May I suggest you engage him as salesman in the livestock department or, if no such vacancy exists, selling toothpaste (of the kind imposed on the long-suffering consumers during Labour’s golden years).
Eve, I would just place Jason teethy Micallef in one of the most horrendous stories of Anton Grasso…readers will be paid for buying this volume – they will definitely get to the bottom of the true, yet hidden (sic!) story of WHAT LED TO THE MISERABLE THIRD CONSECUTIVE DEFEAT OF THE MALTA LABLAB PARTY. Wow! Will this most defeated general secretary of the Malta Lablab Party tell us about how to misprint a political party’s manifesto, to what extent he failed to inform those concerend about vital pre-general elections decisions and the sharp edged sword which he used to behead so many good socialist brains to silence? I would be very keen to see him SMILING (apologies to all toothpaste companies and dentists) on 5 June…the beginning of the most confused, turbulent and divisive period in all the history of the Malta Lablab Party.
By the way…the Malta Lablab Party, under the inspiration of Abela ‘the wise’, are producing a special PANINI book to collect all the faces of the ever-increasing power-crazy contenders (it fits so well with the EURO Cup 2008 Panini players).
labour never cease to amaze and amuse! this latest light bulb from toni is the limit so toni wants to open a supermarket with the takings finding themselves channeled into the mlp coffers. now if that’s not inviting segregation i don’t know what will. imagine a pn supporter shopping at such a place knowing that the money he spends there is being used against his own interest. on the other hand a labourite would choose to boycot all other supermarkets and buy labour sort of. and these people want to run the contry. incredible.