On timesofmalta.com:
Muscat hails ‘cutting edge’ candidates
Joseph Muscat showered praise on the Labour Party’s election candidates this evening, describing them as “cutting edge”.
Aside from the fact that he is quite obviously a speaker of Globish and doesn’t know that you can’t use ‘cutting edge’ for people but only for things like technology or design, here are some examples of Muscat’s cutting-edge candidates.
Karmenu Vella, Il-Guy, JosephMuscat.com’s shadow minister of finance
Louis Grech, far right, aged 65 and in the Mintoff party since the 1960s.
Leo Brincat (in the snazzy jumper) – he was one of Mintoff’s cabinet ministers when I was still at school
Suor Bartolo, another cutting edge sexagenarian and a Commie reject from the 1970s
Marie Louise Coleiro – she was the Labour Party’s secretary-general 30 years ago and more.
Silvio Parnis – you can slit your wrists on his cutting edge
Anthony Zammit wants all the ladies (and more!) to go to his coffee morning – but why would they bother? Give him enough rope, as they say, and…..
Manuel Mallia – so cutting edge that he doesn’t even need to use a knife on this ugly cake
Edward Scicluna – so cutting edge that he was giving Minister of Industry Karmenu Il-Guy advice on economic policy back in the Mintoffian golden years
Jason Micallef – the Queen of Hissy Fits has a tongue that’s a lot sharper than his brain, but then that’s not difficult
Joe Mizzi – oh dear
Id-dentist: really cutting edge. Watch out, the Nationalist Party had one of those.
George Vella: “Allahares nidhlu fl-Ewropa”
Jose Herrera (on right): soon to be Malta’s most cutting-edge Minister of Justice in the history of self-government
Luciano Busuttil – the world’s first cutting-edge turnip, a man who thinks a sexy pick-up line is “Hi, jien is-sindku tal-Hamrun”
Manuel Mallia – oh sorry, we’ve done him already
Antonella tal-iSnobby: not a cutting edge candidate yet, unfortunately, though she’s certainly been under the knife
Sorry, my mistake – this one’s decided to go to Italy instead
Marlene Mizzi – kos, kemm ghandhom sexagenarians tal-Labour. But I must say, those horns look really cutting edge.
Joe Debono Grech – is he in nappies yet?
Drinu tal-Pastizzi’s version of Eva Peron: this one isn’t standing for election, but boy, is she going to be running the country.
Charlie Azzopardi – a man who never washes his hair because he was born with sunglasses welded to the top of his head.
I couldn’t find a suitable picture of Cyrus Engerer, so I hacked into his hard drive and took one of his instead.
I can’t remember what these two were called, but I’m pretty sure they’re standing for election with the Labour Party
Yana Mintoff – enough said.
Nikita Zammit Alamango – there’s even more to grab now, but she spends most of her time hanging about with Cyrus and his Bugs Bunny Boyfriend Randolph, so it’s going to waste.
Scary bunch !
Just this post alone should be enough to settle the matter. The fact that it is not reaffirms that PL’s rebranding exercise has been so successful that it has insulated people against what is so very obvious to everyone else.
Useless jokes.
You forgot the sharpest TOOL in the box:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riX2ltrnFoU
But in reality they are blunt-edge.
What a pumpkin head. What a bunch with brain of seeds.
U Daphne, lil Silvio erhilu ghax naqsmek!
Not cutting edge but cutting corners.
About as cutting edge as performing open-heart surgery with a pair of pliers and a mallet.
Prosit, Daphne. I am going to send you the bill for the mess in my living-room. We all peed in our pants with laughter and it’s all your fault. Shame on you for killing us this way.
Gonzi goes; Simon becomes leader; then how long until Muscat crashes and burns?
And mega piss-takes every day.
Thank you for giving us such articles. Some of those captions are priceless. Some comic relief in the face of doom.
Prosit, Daphne. You made my day.
Don’t know if you noticed but that cock has Franco’s attitude.
The bogus ‘professor’ in dark glasses behind il-Guy (fig. 3) never did have the sharpest scalpels on the block.
Now approaching seventy, they’re blunter than ever.
This is so funny! Well done. And sadly enough, yes so so true!
And let’s not forget Alfred Sant’s nephew, as if one Sant wasn’t enough for Malta.
I spit my coffee as I swiped down on Silvio Parnis. He should be Ministru tat-Tablets.
I almost fell off my chair in fits of laughter! Comic relief at its best – if only it was just comic relief though.
Ara f’idejn min ha jispicca l pajjiz.
Close to the university someone sprayed “A country gets the government it deserves” on a wall. It is a sign of things to come.
So true!
Konrad “energy expert” Mizzi seems to have escaped your notice! How come?
That’s it,I’ve decided. I’m voMIting Labour.
“SILVIO PARNIS – YOU CAN SLIT YOUR WRISTS ON HIS CUTTING EDGE” ~ hilarious!
The Muppets were named Statler and Waldorf.
You’re just as funny as Jeremy Clarkson.
Speaking of Antonella ta’ snobby, have a look at her sisters Nataxha and Nakita cheering for Joseph… ‘cutting edge’ tassew
http://www.facebook.com/nakita.snobbija
Oh. My. God.
Who’s this Snobby? A pimp?
Thank you for sharing that, snobby. I nearly passed out I was laughing so hard.
For a change they are all Laburisti. Who would have thought that had such hamalli in their moviment. I guess they keep them well hidden.
Surprise, surprise! She has ‘Anti-Gonzi’ in her favourites list.
Yes, cutting edge all right. The thought of them running the country make me want to cut my wrists.
Classic Daphne, love it. However poor us for having such short memories.
Crazy to hear friends are ready to give these loonies their vote because the Nationalists have become arrogant. Always preferred arrogance to stupidity.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14njUwJUg1I
But the PN certainly cannot boast of a cutting edge campaign. It is just not going anywhere, and the gap is widening.
It’s incredible that with this type of opposition the PN is looking all the more hapless.
What a shame – PN with such a track record versus PL without even an electoral programme and this is the result.
If it continues this way, it will surely be a case study in political science.
No, not political science, but the psychology and IQ levels of a small island state.
You are UNIQUE! The envy of Joseph Muscat and his imbecilic cutting edge candidates.
Cannot understand how on earth the Maltese will vote for a Labour Party with such a hopeless crowd. I was waiting for a Muscat picture
wahahahaaaaa! wait, wait….wahahahaaaaaaaaa!!
¨Cutting edge¨ is an overused cliche from the late 90s. Oh, sounds just about right then.
You can never be cutting edge if you vote Labour. It’s a contradiction in terms.
More like cutting off your nose to spite your face. Sadistic idiots.
Good one, laughed my head off.
Now don’t go and vote for them.
OMG.
My God! We’re so spoiled for choice.
They’re all so damn good.
Really good :)
Daphne, you are a genius, this post made my day, thanks a lot!
Thanks for making my day.
I laughed till I cried. Brilliant.
Fantastic
But you’re always leaving out Toni Abela…..
Toni Abela is not a candidate.
One of the best posts written in this election run-up. Absolute gem.
I really needed this hilarious interlude. I’m trying hard not to laugh out loud.
haha well done Daphne dear !! Bitter pill for you and for your followers to swallow hux??? c’mon show us more – we are so amused!!!!
Fantastic post, brilliant wit on your part Daphne!
And they were Waldorf & Stadtler from The Muppet Show.
Hey that’s a thought – Labour – Malta’s own Muppet Show! (think, UK street-slang here).
Dawn zgur kollha ahjar minn Anglu Farrugia ghax hadd minnhom ma’ tkecca mill-Partit tal-Labour.
Anqas dawk fosthom li huwa evidenti li kienu responsabbli ta’ korruzzjoni fi zmien gvernijiet Laburisti precedenti.
Izma Anglu tkecca u hadd ma’ jaf sewwa ghal xiex anqas il-Laburisti stess.
Trid tkun vera kabocca biex tohrog tirraprezenta partit b’hala kanditat qabel ma’ tkun taf x’inhu il-programm elttorali tieghu.
Ahseb u ara x’mohh ghandhom dawk in-nies li jivvutaw ghal dawn il-kandidati.
Mentalita’ tal-biki.
Sharp or not, they will slay Malta by a thousand cuts.
Scary prospect.
Prime candidates for retroactive abortion, the whole lot; if someone can come up with a practical procedure.
Shoot me.
Daphne please keep them coming!
I heard star candidate Edward Scicluna declare on TVAMthat Malta’s economic situation is at par with Spain’s. It would become so if he is entrusted with this country’s economy.
look at Muscat’s model – Cyprus
http://www.ft.com/intl/cms/s/0/af602e60-6bd0-11e2-a700-00144feab49a.html#axzz2JeD5wsja
Dr Muscat asked about allowing homosexuals to give blood. He was adamant that blood donation criteria should not be based on sexual orientation.
Issa sar jifhem fil-medicina il-boy. Prosit
I am adamant that voting criteria should be based on intellectual capacity.
Not that anyone’ll listen.
Really, what an imbecile.
What about Marion Mizzi? Another star PL candidate?
What she’s going to promise us? A better quality of life based on vegetables?
The latest star candidate is Marion Mizzi. What next on Joseph’s pre-electoral presents? Free slimming treatments to all?
Ghax kullhadd mejjet bil-guh. That’s why she ran out of business.
She had better start with the Great Leader then. He really does waddle instead of walk.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LP_2RxIhRHM&feature=player_embedded#!
Health Minister Joe Cassar had a whale of a time at the blood bank.
One thing’s for sure: Joseph is afraid of the needle.
A visit to the blood donation centre should have been crowned with at least a blood donation not a stupid stunt on gay rights.
His insistence only shows the depth of his logic, and that there were no consultations with the so called experts.
The only consultations were the polls.
While we are on the subject of what is cutting edge,
I thought the readers of this blog might be interested in this article in my local newspaper, The Orange County Register.
http://www.ocregister.com/news/students-383724-ipad-school.html
My son, who is now in college, attended Mater Dei High School. The school just won the Apple Distinguished School staus for 2012-2013. This award was to recognize their use of Apple technology, “to demonstrate an innovative and compelling learning environment that engages students and provides tangible evidence of academic accomplishment.”
In 2011, the school started a program where each student (2,100 of them) and teachers (100 of them) were provided with an iPad. They are leased from Apple and the students pay a $35 monthly fee.
This whole process of integrating iPads into the school curriculum did not happen overnight but was the result of a lot of planning and training on the part of the school, the teachers, the students and the parents.
You can’t just hand out iPads the way you hand out candy, (which seems to be the way Joseph Muscay wants to do it), and have a real impact on education. A lot of groundwork and preparation need to be done first.
How dare you?
We don’t need groundwork and preparation.
Don’t you know everyone here is an expert in everything?
You cannot hand out iPads without knowing what they’ll be used for. That’s the problem. It’s like handing out stacks of blank paper. Of course it doesn’t help that MUT was led for many years by a certain John Bencini.
BBC News – Mexico City blast: Hunt for survivors in Pemex building
Electing these turds is like cutting our noses to spite our faces. They don’t need to do it for us.
Literally crying with laughter! Well done, Daphne!
Below is the Labour candidate Lorna Vassallo’s description on her facebook page (copied and pasted). Very cutting edge, I think you’d agree.
I think she wants to be part of the PL team because of all those cutting edge men.
About Lorna
A keen globe trotting artist who is always on the look-out for terrific new people to be with. Ironically enough, though, sometimes, when you see her alone just keep out of the way, because she might be in the reflective mood :)
All my friends have had the pleasure of knowing that if they’re my friends :)
Basic info
Gender Female
Interested in Men
Relationship Status Single
Languages Maltese, German, French, Italian and English
Contact Info
Website
/
http://www.lornavassallo.com
[Daphne – Oh my God, is she still alive and kicking? That’s the one who had a GODAWFUL column below Ranier Fsadni’s in The Times. It had a cult following, it was so bad. It was as though she scanned the dictionary every morning, collected words, and threw them into as few sentences as possible.]
She’s just been elected president of the ‘Ghaqda tal-Malti’.
I think Ill have to leave the country soon..
Objective “cutting edge” maybe ?
http://www.independent.com.mt/articles/2013-04-25/news/objective-what-pl-meps-stumped-by-question-1462206465/