GUEST POST: A typical Muscat cabinet meeting
Prime Minister Muscat has opted to use the same system as Prime Minister Gonzi.
“Never change a winning method” he had said to his new ministers on their first meeting. His head of secretariat, Alex Sceberras Trigona, is so happy to be entering Castille again that he is continuously seen going in and out when he spots a group of tourists in front of the newly refurbished facade.
As such groups became less regular, he asks his driver to stand by to alert him as soon as he spots a group of anything, even schoolchildren.
At the moment Sceberras Trigona is worried. Muscat is late again for yet another meeting and Joe Debono Grech, Minister for Workers and Public Transport, is impatient: “Dan gej ghax haqq l-gh*xx il-b***la f’z**b dak il-l**a ha ngholli kollox?”
Minister for Social Policy Marie Louise Coleiro Preca has made a formal request to have her name and surname correctly pronounced by the 50 or so newly employed messengers and dogsbodies at Castille: “Għidilhom Alex li hawn m’aħniex il-Maċina, u jien ma jismnix ‘Louise’.”
“Il-Maċina…aħħ…x’memorji,” George Vella, Minister of Foreign Affairs, exclaims. He wipes away a tear.
Joe Debono Grech’s communication skills have upset Edward Scicluna, who likes it to be known that he is accustomed to civilised environments. “U ejja Joe, tgħajjatx….fi Brussel mhux hekk nagħmlu. Jekk xi ħadd jiġi tard nieħdu paċenzja u nistennew.”
To which the Minister for Education and Freedom of Expression, Evarist Bartolo, replies: “Jista jgħid li irid għax aħna pajjiz demokratiku. Fi żmien Mintoff hekk konna nagħmlu.”
Finance Minister Karmenu Vella and Minister for Procurement Leo Brincat are at loggerheads on the free tablet issue. It seems Vella forgot to include it in his costings, while Brincat has already issued a direct order.
“U ejja, Leo, grow up. Inneħħu tat-teachers u nieħdu l-flus minn tal-MCAST.”
“Mur oqgħod bihom. Int ma kontx għedtli li daħħlthom fil-budget?”
“Issa jekk insejt xi tridni nagħmel.”
“Flippin stop it, guys. I can’t concentrate.” It’s the Minister for Energy, Konrad Mizzi, who is busy trying to figure out where to start.
“Isma Konrad se jgħolli leħnu issa, għadu jibda. XEJM ON YOU, KONRAD,” shouts Debono Grech, to which all 20 Ministers and 15 Parliamentary Secretaries laugh their socks off.
At this point Prime Minister Muscat enters the packed room. “Tajjeb li nara kullhadd jiehu gost waqt li jiena I battle it out with the media. Ejja let’s get started qabel ma jcempel xi fonqlu ieħor. Ghandna bzonn naghmlu post ghal ministru iehor, il-Ministru tax-Xandir Jason Micallef, u ghal konsulent gdid tal-kabinett, Beppe Hili”.
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Very worrying but funny. Prosit!
Il-bezziegha are at it again http://www.independent.com.mt/articles/2013-02-28/news/pl-deputy-leaders-fail-to-turn-up-for-students-debate-999096320/
‘Joe Debono Grech, Minister for Workers and Public Transport, is impatient: “Dan gej ghax ngholli kollox?”’
So wrong! Where are the colourful expletives?
Vague hints – complete with asterisks in the appropriate places – at what we all, unhappily, were accustomed to for so many ‘golden’ years under Dom and his crew-cut successor.
Prosit for the dismal picture of 35 plus 1 pretenders and mini dictators.
Strange Days by The Doors will be the order of the day.
It would be funny had it been not so frighteningly real.
I find it very sad really, to be honest. Although Malta became officially a member of the EU, about 10 years or so ago, it will take us a long time before we actually become Europeans.
Unfortunately designer bags, dresses, furniture etc do not make us Europeans.
We are talking about a mentality change that is needed here. Is it the Pink Floyd that have the song that goes by the title of ‘comfortably numb’?
That describes us Maltese. So spoilt we can actually take 9 weeks away from the real problems facing the rest of the world and concentrate on our all so important election.
Still laughing but at the same time worried that if some of us Maltese are stupid enough to vote Lejber instead of PN this could be the harsh reality we will be facing in a few weeks’ time.
Here’s another twist:
Karmenu: Oops… m’ghandniex flus ghalihom it-teblits li weghna lit-tat-tfal.
Leo: Insejt tinkludihom fil-budget, Karm?
Karmenu: U Le, x’insejt. Id-direttivi ma kienux li nweghdu kollox – laqwa nirbhu!
Leo: Ghandek ragun, Karm.
Karmenu: Issa x’ha naghmlu, Leo?
Leo: Halli f’idejja. Naghmlu it-tablits illegali ghal kullhadd minghajr permess diretta mil-ministur kif konna naghmlu bit televisions u t-telephones.
Karmenu: Ahh… a return to The Golden Years. Yesssss…!