H. P. Baxxter on the subject of the prime minister’s coat

Published: December 1, 2013 at 4:34pm

OPM_28112013_01_Joseph-Muscat

The Department of Information’s caption: The Prime Minister, Hon Joseph Muscat, arriving for the Heads of State and Government informal working dinner at the Eastern Partnership Summit.

The verdict of H.P. Baxxter, this website’s menswear consultant:

Coats. Oh dear.

Let me start again. Coats: that necessary item in any man’s wardrobe, unless he’s living in the tropics or the Med. In Malta, they’re just worn once a year, by total dickheads who can neither carry them off nor behave like adults.

But enough of me. Let’s talk about the PM. What was he thinking here? Coats should be roomy around the shoulders, in order to fit the suit jacket underneath, but he’s gone full Arnie, when he has the shoulders of Danny de Vito at best. He looks like a very proud and conceited gnome wearing a black garbage bag, trying to sneak away down the garden path.

Let us not even go into the merit of the zip-up top underneath. That is actually a zip-off liner on the chest area. Many off-the-peg coats come with them nowadays. Sensible men will zip the horrible thing off and never look at it again. But our PM likes to keep snug (surely, ‘smug’?) so “libislu”, as the ancient Maltese idiom goes.

And another thing. “Hon” is what Michelle calls Joseph. But it’s not what anyone outside parliament should be calling him. Yes, I am a stickler for rules, egad. And I hereby declare that the caption-writer at the DOI is a total ignoramus.




18 Comments Comment

  1. P Shaw says:

    Al Capone and his henchmen/henchwomen arriving at the negotiating discussions with the FBI to strike an amnesty deal.

  2. ciccio says:

    As we say in Maltese: “Ma jmurx jiehu xi cmajra.”

  3. La Redoute says:

    “He looks like a very proud and conceited gnome wearing a black garbage bag, trying to sneak away down the garden path.”

    Priceless.

  4. Aunt Hetty says:

    He borrowed that coat from the costumes department of the Boardwalk Empire series.

  5. TinaB says:

    “He looks like a very proud and conceited gnome wearing a black garbage bag, trying to sneak away down the garden path.”

    Hilarious.

    God bless you, H.P. Baxxter.

  6. P Sant says:

    @He looks like a very proud and conceited gnome wearing a black garbage bag.@

    HP, I’m going to sue you for medical expenses. I’ve just spilt coffee out of my nose and I’ve been coughing for the past quarter of an hour.

  7. Last Post says:

    Worthy of the best “Attakk Faħxi” u dispreġjattiv fuq il-persuna u l-karattru tal-Hon (orevoli) prim ministru ta’ pajjiżna !

    Kos, qed ngħid, tgħallmu jiddandnu ‘bil-libsa u s-surtun’.

    PL = Partit tal-Lanżit

  8. Joe Fenech says:

    I’m probably way too old to consider myself at the cutting edge of fashion, but – is a zipper jumper (or whatever he is wearing) suitable as part of formal attire? I doubt it.

  9. Wot the Hack says:

    The DOI says that this was the INFORMAL working dinner of the Heads of State and Government at the Eastern Partnership Summit.

    Can anyone imagine what he would be wearing for a FORMAL meeting of the summit?

  10. R Camilleri says:

    Isn’t the guy on the left the owner of Oriental Garden Chinese restaurant? Looks really like him. What is he doing there?

  11. pale blue my foot! says:

    Why the frown? Or do I detect a hint of a smirk?

  12. davidg says:

    R Camilleri, the guy on the left is the prime minister’s bodyguard.

  13. Peritocracy says:

    I read until “coats oh dear”, then got one good look at the photo and decided the man looks squat and short as hell. Now I’ll read on.

    • Peritocracy says:

      Spot on! Though I admit Baxxter is more verbose and funny.

      [Daphne – He isn’t verbose at all. Verbose is pejorative.]

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