‘Jo’ promised that this would be the “most feminist government ever”. Now it is holding a Malta Man Expo.

Published: March 26, 2014 at 3:23pm

Malta Man

Jo, as our prime minister is known in the theatrical circles where a grown woman shouts ‘f*cking w*nker’ at a cabinet minister because she has to wait for a bus and where her friend feeds whisky and pills to one of his underage pupils and drives her to some cliffs at 4am, promised us that his would be the most feminist government ever.

But all we have had is women treated like decorative items – the Berlusconi approach to feminism – while one decidedly non-decorative one is made president, and that’s about it.

Now today it was announced – by Jo’s best friend and travelling companion, Edward Zammit Lewis the PS for Whatever (currently touted as the next finance minister) – that there is to be a Malta Man Expo. This will celebrate, we are told, Maltese man in all his various and wonderful forms.

Really? The last time I looked, with a few exceptions mainly in the younger generation, there was mainly one form: 5’3″ with disproportionately short limbs, especially the legs. These proportions – long torso, minuscule legs – are even present in Maltese men who are slightly bigger (I use the word advisedly) than the Maltese average, like Jo and his friend Zammit Lewis.

Now I’m going to get a lot of emails from men pointing out that they’re tall, or short but perfectly proportioned. Who cares? It’s the dominant form that counts, and if you go to the average Maltese wedding, you’ll see exactly what I mean.

Malta Man Expo – ridiculous. In 13 months this island has become a poisonous mix of gross acts against democracy coupled with the infantilisation and alienation of the electorate with myriad stunts and circus acts.




24 Comments Comment

  1. Calculator says:

    As a Maltese man myself (unless Ms Coleiro Preca has her way), even I find this situation weird, to say the least.

  2. xifajk says:

    Ippermettili nerga’ niffoka fuq dal-kumment:

    The intent is to acknowledge Maltese men that truly deserve recognition for all they do making Malta a better place’, stated Dr. Edward Zammit Lewis while launching the Malta Men Expo.

    Qed inhossni tajjeb.

  3. H.P. Baxxter says:

    This is one instance where a fringe festival is essential.

  4. Manuel says:

    “of gross acts against democracy coupled with the infantilisation and alienation of the electorate with myriad stunts and circus acts.”

    Well said, Daphne. And the majority are happy to participate in this circus: Bundy, Bondi, Peppi, the wank*r shouting girl, the MDA…and the list goes on and on…

  5. Tabatha White says:

    Xandru Grech?

    The line-up is more representative of Lebanese and Middle-Eastern men.

  6. Kevin says:

    You should have issued your usual “attakk fahxi fuq” warning, Daphne.

  7. H.P. Baxxter says:

    Here’s my proposed line-up for the Fringe Expo.

    THE REAL MAN EXPO

    1. Matthew Camilleri (ex Royal Anglian Regiment, one tour in Afghanistan, currently a Sergeant in Malta Sea Cadet Corps, among others)

    2. Fabio Spiteri (Ironman, unsung triathlon hero, “CEO of” nothing except himself. Respect.)

    3. Dwardu Ellul (Long dead. The only original thinker to emerge from this rock. Obviously co-opted as one of their own by the Mintoffiani.)

    4. Gerald Strickland (Dead too, alas. The only Maltese Liberal leader ever. Total and utter RESPECT)

    5. Louis Bartolo (Dead too. Killed Il-Fusellu. Only man ever to have uttered a word of sense on Xarabank, upon being invited to express a Christmas greeting by the silly Joe Azzopardi: “I wish a happy Christmas to those who keep the scales of justice balanced. The rest – GO TO BLOODY HELL!”

    6. John Azzopardi (too many dead men on my list). Only man ever to have stood up to Alex Sceberras Trigona on public television. A good Scout, literally.

    That should be enough.

    • ken il malti says:

      Prime Minister Joseph Howard was no push-over, especially as director of the Cousis cigarette factory.

      A manly man with a reputed fine bodily scent of Burley and Bright Virginia tobaccos.

    • H.P. Baxxter says:

      Erratum: John Mizzi, not Azzopardi.

  8. Anthony says:

    And for chairman of the organising committee, Manu Maltes.

  9. Jozef says:

    I don’t get it, so what exactly will they have on the stands, zalzett Malti?

    • ciccio says:

      Some splendid examples of Maltese manhood:

      1. Manwel Mallia

      2. Keith tal-KASCO

      3. Silvio Parnis

      4. Toni Abela

      5. Jose Herrera (wink wink)

      6. Karmenu Vella

      7. Do You Know Who He Is?

      8. Franco Debono

      9. Jeffrey Pullicino Orlando Smith III

      10. Stefan Buontempo

      11. Manwel Cuschieri

      12. ‘Jo’

      13. Erin Stewart Tanti

      14. Manu Maltes

      15. John Dalli

      16. Cyrus Engerer

      17. Anglu Farrugia

      18. Kurt Farrugia

      19. Charlon Gouder

      20. Glen Bedingfield

      And in the history section:

      1. Dom Mintoff

      2. Lorry Sant

      3. Agatha Barbara

    • Grezz says:

      No. Bajd tal-barri.

  10. Francesca says:

    Surprise surprise, Xandru Grech son of Louis Grech seems to be involved. I hope some men don’t take EXPO literally and go and expose themselves. God help us, a venue full of short naked Laburisti.

  11. hmm says:

    How silly can it get. Very liberal indeed – where is the stay at home dad section? Why can’t they do a creative arts expo instead, promoting artists who are trying to start up their creative business.

    • Chris Ripard says:

      I’ll tell you why, hmm, because it will be hijacked by the Fredrick Testas, the Felix Busuttils, the Adrian Buckles, the Willie Mangions and the Erin Stewart Tantis, that’s why.

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