The newest Maltese citizens are called Zveyrone, Netsrik, Jaceyrhaer, Zarkareia, Amporn, Chinenye, Enonima, Kobbun, Gundula, Limoni, Hunter and Loic

Published: June 29, 2014 at 10:53pm

amporn

In a couple of these cases, you can tell what the parents wanted, so you just have to wonder why nobody at the registration office guided them accordingly.

Zarkareia, for instance, is clearly meant to be Zachariah. Netsrik is meant to be Nesrik. Chinenye’s mother was aiming for Cheyenne, and that is probably how she pronounced it at the registration desk.

I have a sneaking feeling that Kobbun is meant to be Coburn, and that Jaceyrhaer has to be Jeseriah.




55 Comments Comment

  1. H.P. Baxxter says:

    I, Amporn.

    The newest, hottest play to hit the West End.

  2. ciccio says:

    Coult Netsrik be Kirsten in reverse?

    Apparently Kirsten is the Scandinavian equivalent of Christina.

  3. gorg says:

    Amporn? Poor child.

  4. Joe Fenech says:

    ‘Loic’ should be ‘Loïc’ (in English it would sound somethling like: Lor – yeek)

  5. Banana republic ... again says:

    Like many European countries have, Malta too needs to have laws and guidelines for naming children. The minimum should be proof that the chosen name is actually a name already.

  6. Peritocracy says:

    I thought Netsrik was just meant to be Kirsten back to front.

  7. Another John says:

    Daphne, do not hold your breath on the assumptions you have made. Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction and this is the manifestation of current Maltese truth. Sometimes I really wonder what years upon years of free education in our country have produced. Just where did we go wrong?

      • A.Attard says:

        What happened on that day? Seems to be Alfred Sant’s fault then.

      • H.P. Baxxter says:

        Come, you know me well enough by now. That’s when Xarabank first aired.

      • Another John says:

        Totally obsessed with Xarabank (and Peppi?)…. Not that I blame you. Trash for the trash. Poor country.

      • H.P. Baxxter says:

        It’s just that I keep looking for the famous point when everything went tits up, and I keep finding myself staring at the latter part of the 90s.

        Sometimes changed deep within us in the few years between 95 and 99. Remember one thing: that’s when the number of TV stations and ‘local’ productions exploded. It coincides with the birth of Xarabank, the infamous ‘Ipokriti’ and the wall-to-wall carpeting with bling.

        And that’s when the Darkness engulfed us.

      • Another John says:

        Well, if you are so sure of it, I guess ‘beato te’. There could be some pointers to that period but what do you make of the rape of Malta by the few for two decades prior to that and the glorification of that period by the masses? No, humanity definately needs to develop, and, not just in Malta, for that matter. Sometimes I wish to think that there were higher forms of life on this planet in the past (pyramids) and something has happened to these civizations. But let me stop here.

      • H.P. Baxxter says:

        Just vote Lowell, and you’ll save the Ancient Tocharian civilisation.

      • A.Attard says:

        The root cause is Mintoff

  8. Big Daddy says:

    Apart from the ridiculousness of some of the names, we can’t discount the possibility that a few of them have been given to children born to people from a non-Maltese background. A quick Google search shows that Chinenye is a Nigerian name, for instance.

  9. TinaB says:

    Tal-biki.

  10. M. says:

    The public registry’s list of names would include names of babies born to parents of non-Maltese origin, which would explain a few of the “strange” names, though not all of them.

  11. il-Ginger says:

    I hope Gundula catches on.

  12. Connor Attard says:

    Amporn…what were they thinking? The poor girl (or is it a boy?) is going to be the butt of every raunchy joke in secondary school.

  13. MC says:

    Loic is actually a known French name, but yes the others are ridiculous.

  14. Weird no ? says:

    Can you imagine when a teacher calls the attendance register in class in six or seven years’ time?

  15. Mama says:

    Amporn must be a child born to Thai parents as it is common in Thailand to have names ending with porn.

    • Mike says:

      I was brave enough to Google it. It is indeed a Thai name and it means ‘Gold from the sky’.

      However, although it is an acceptable name in Thailand, parents must really consider the culture the child will be brought up in. This child will be mocked, there is no question about it.

      He is likely to be mocked well into adult life too and this is why the name is a really bad idea. The Russian name Sergei is another good example of this.

  16. helen says:

    Ejja nghaddu naqra quality time ma’ Quality. Ejja hi.

  17. helen says:

    Dik Gundala fuq rasek? Min ghamililek? Se tibqa’ Enonima?

    • ketchup says:

      Soooo very funny…I had members of my family wonder what I was laughing about when I was reading this comment.

      As for Limoni, I had heard that in a film years ago but cannot remember the title. True, some names might be of ‘foreign’ children but some are concocted by the parents to be original, and original they sure are.

      I know of a child whose name is half as weird as these mentioned and her father happens to be illiterate but I think that he has been taught how to spell it.

  18. Pippa says:

    Some parents don’t bother to check the spelling of a name and sometimes it might be a mistake of the clerk filling in the forms.

    Once, when I was still employed with the government I wondered why an email sent through the official internet service never reached its destination.

    Wonder of wonders, I found that the person’s name, a common one at that, had been wrongly typed by the clerk inputting the data.

    And silly me had typed the name correctly, according to normal spelling.

  19. Andrew Vella says:

    Limoni? As in the late ‘Peaches’ Geldof?

  20. Mike Farrugia says:

    Amporn (Difesa) is an adopted child. She lives in St. Paul’s Bay.

  21. Osservatore says:

    I recently saw a car with “on board” windscreen plates saying “Raissa and Ratzinger on board”.

    Enonima. Say no more.

  22. Painter says:

    Maybe Kobbun is meant to be Cobain.

  23. Ju says:

    I’d let them be. It’s a good way to quickly identify someone coming from the “Other” Malta and steer clear of them.

  24. Desmond says:

    Mulej, hudni.

  25. Ruth says:

    Recently I attended my 20th anniversary school reunion where we had a lovely mass and each one of the girls, now women, reintroduced ourselves by our name and recalled our school days.

    One of the most ‘surprising’ things amongst our discussions that evening was how normal and common all our names are compared to today’s babies and children. To name a few..Maria, Ann, Claire, Ruth, Graziella, Josette…mostly also biblical names.

    Sadly, it seems that if one had to name a baby one of these names today, they’ll be branded old fashioned. The ‘cool and right’ thing to do nowadays is to grab a common name, put in a few vowels here and there, and there you have it, a unique and original name that even the parents can’t pronounce. Such a pity.

  26. eve says:

    Nice first impression when applying for a job. Didn’t these parents know it?

  27. bob-a-job says:

    Watson a name they say.

    Well names can be rather amusing at times.

    http://www.collegehumor.com/post/6940489/39-just-unfortunate-names

    Or how about these two queer fellas from Scotland.

    Ben Doon and Phil Mac Cavity.

  28. fm says:

    Jiena middle class u lit-tifel Joseph ha nsemmih ghall-prim minstru mahbub u bravu taghna hi.

  29. Tal-Pepe says:

    Perhaps we should go down the same path as they did in Sonora, Mexico and just ban certain names or at least suggest correctly-spelt alternatives.

  30. gorg says:

    If I had to choose, I’d go for Cowlin.

  31. R. Azzopardi says:

    Daphne, I remember an article you had written back in 1997 regarding children’s names at the time and it was hilarious. Those names were totally acceptable in comparison to these!

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