What sort of ADC does President Coleiro have?

The more poorly educated the head of state is, the more pressing the need for him or her to have an excellent ADC. In this case, it looks like it’s a double disaster: a poorly educated president with a poorly educated ADC.

Nobody ever gave me any specific training in these matters, but even I know that in these situations the couple will both exit from the same side of the car: the side closest to the building and where the welcoming party is waiting. You don’t exit from the car door further away from the building and then trot round the car to the welcoming party – nor does the welcoming head of state trot round the car and away from the building to the car-door furthest away and then trot back with whoever emerges, splitting the welcome party in two.

Also, the Queen is meant to alight first, with her husband following. It is quite obvious what happened here: the Queen was seated behind the driver as she was meant to be in line with the original plan to alight in St George’s Square, which would have put her closest to the Palace gateway (seated on the right when driving down Republic Street).

But the plans for St George’s Square were changed at the last minute and nobody changed the seating arrangements inside the car, so when they drew up in the palace courtyard, Prince Philip was closest to the building and the welcome party and had to alight first, with his wife sliding across the seat to alight after him, pointedly ignoring the door held open on the other side.

Meanwhile, President Coleiro – oblivious to all the formalities – behaved as though she was greeting a friend who had arrived for lunch, and couldn’t even understand why the visiting head of state does not emerge from the car door further away from the welcoming party.

I really despair.