Where’s Hello magazine when you need it?

Young and glamorous Labour leader Joseph Muscat wows an audience of excited fans as he takes his seat in parliament as Leader of the Opposition. Though the stresses and strains of his hard work and demanding lifestyle are apparent in his recent dramatic hair loss, handsome Joseph is confident it will return, and if not, we at Hello magazine know that he will look as elegant using other options as his former mentor Alfred Sant, who is now devoting himself to intellectual pursuits that make the most of his impressive intelligence. At Joseph’s side as always is his lovely wife Michelle, wearing a magnificent couture dress in moonshine silver. Michelle has recovered her stunning figure after the birth of twins Etoile and Soleil, in whose honour her shimmering gown has been crafted. The beautiful couple, who we at Hello magazine believe look so much like JFK and Jackie, clutched each other’s hands to show the world their love as they strolled out of the spectacular Grand Master’s Palace and into the warmth of the waiting crowd, all of whom shouted with one voice: “Joseph! Michelle! Viva l-Labour.” Joseph and Michelle were accompanied on their walk of fame by Labour MP Joseph Cuschieri, who heroically gave up his seat in the house so that the Labour Party may be saved – his face glowing with the joy of altruism. We at Hello magazine salute the dawn of a new era.