Oh my, now I'm in a real fix
The front of a bus - because the back is defamatory
One of the ‘allegations’ which Consuelo Herrera ‘denied’ in court was the bit where I wrote in reply to somebody else that she looks like a cross between Worzel Gummidge and the back of a bus. Apparently, she feels seriously defamed by this and told the court ‘M’iniex xi stilla, imma….’
But on the other hand, she didn’t feel defamed by the bits where she broke up the marriage of somebody with a new baby, cheated on her husband repeatedly, or shagged his architect.
She read out the bit where I described her involvement in that highly controversial development of a block of flats on the entry road to Lija, using her husband’s money while shagging his architect.
In court, she read all the way up to just before ‘shagging his architect’ and then stopped abruptly.
Now I’m in a bit of a fix because I have to find a photograph of a bus-rear that bears more than a passing resemblance to Consuelo Herrera. Alternatively, I can take a tip out of her book, take an oath and say ‘Oh my god, is that a bus? I thought it was the magistrate.’
As for her feeling defamed by being called middle-aged, I guess it will be no trouble at all proving that she’s not going to live to 150.
You’d think she’d have grown out of her complex insecurities about her appearance by now. But no. Criticising her shape is a worse slur than criticising her morality.
And then she says that I don’t know her.
I’d better go now, because I see Robert Musumeci at the gate. I wonder what he wants. Oh dear, my mistake. It’s a bus wearing white spectacles.
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I, as a reasonable person, assumed you were talking about this
http://www.herreracoach.com/images/bus%20046.jpg
Tghidx cuccati, Dominic. That’s a lovely bus, imma insomma meta tkun bil-ghatx, kull qatra tghodd.
Why, Daphne, wasn’t it this bus you were talking about? Thta’s a compliment, no?
http://www.adrants.com/images/bus_back_bikini.jpg
http://weblog.greenpeace.org.nz/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/greepeacebus081.jpg
http://www.retroroadtrips.com/productionnotes/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/vt-back-of-old-bus.jpg
http://www.acquiweb.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/dsc00714.jpg
Tajba, Anna! You had me in stitches with those links.
The last bus said “Were are we going?” and I said “To hell” – at least that is what i hope these people will get, nothing but hell.
That’s an American bus, which looks quite cute and which comment she should take as a compliment rather than defamation.
What would she have said if you had insinuated that she looked like the back of an old Maltese bus?
Joking apart, if you (and I) think she looks like the back of a bus, the court cannot change your opinion can it?
http://www.made-in-england.org/images/wellplaced_exhaust.jpg
Back end of bus …. check
Police……… check
Smutty innuendo….. check (look at the exhaust)
Maybe she thought you meant this:
http://www.maltainsideout.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/Welcome-aboard-malta-bus.jpg
http://www.californiasailplanes.com/duckedit.jpg
Oh dear, I thought it was a bus. Now I see that it was the head of the vice squad.
http://www.pbase.com/garoessler/image/25713050
http://www.pbase.com/garoessler/image/25713044
Ms CG – looking at some of these great pics, I wonder now if your comments in the magistrate’s regard may not actually be derogatory to buses.
You’d best prepare for a new flood of defamation suits heading your way from the venda tal-Belt.
Careful if you compare her to the front of a bus too…
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3389/3592086059_76c7c0d851.jpg
Ma fixklitux ma’ dan. hux?
http://disneyworldgang.com/DisneyRacers/images/Kermit%20The%20Frog.JPG
jew dan
http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/muppet/images/thumb/f/fe/BurgerKing1999SpaceBus.jpg/200px-BurgerKing1999SpaceBus.jpg
Li nafu zgur, ma kienx dan
http://www.virginballoonflights.co.uk/main.asp
No comment:
http://www.weirdomatic.com/wp-content/pictures/2007/01/124702685_3945a88b32.jpg
Back or Front?
http://boingboing.net/2008/04/22/funy-backwards-bus-a.html
Have you noticed how in most of the ‘party’ photos posted here, Robert is hovering in the background with a plastic smile on his face? Who knows what’s going through his mind?
In that Hello style interview in a local Sunday rag Robert Musumeci said that their relationship only started after they’d been friends for a while. Maybe those photos were taken while they were just friends.
Isn’t friendship a relationship? ‘Their relationship only started after they’d been friends for a while’ – the alternative would have been jumping into bed together immediately, if sex is what makes a relationship for Robert Musumeci.
‘A relationship’ is his euphemism for sex. Not even Malta Today could bring itself to mention the word in his regard.
Why is it that so many Maltese people find it hard to use the word “sex”?
While waiting in court for the infamous Musumeci / Daphne case last Monday, I decided to sit through the preceding sittings.
One of them – concerning a porn charge, from what I could gather – included the a court expert testifying what he found on the accused’s computer/CDs/whatever. It included a description of how someone set up a webcam, a young lady (tfajla) came into the room, and then a man “kellu x’jaqsam maghha, kollox”.
@s fenech
I’ve noticed that in most of the party photos, Robert is waving his arms in the air and looking just like the village idiot
The wheels of the bus go round and round.
Forsi xtaqet tkun xi wiehed minn dawn?
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/212/521888020_203e649ac5.jpg
http://www.blueberryrides.com/zbus/images/pig.jpg
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_tUKk-H056vY/SEWAUYaehaI/AAAAAAAAA_M/wXk3V0xZn34/s400/6.jpg
http://media.photobucket.com/image/pig%20bus/intothesunstudio/NEMHCchinabuffet09/summersolsticeweekend2009050.jpg?o=12
Jew tilel il-boxla dan waqt li kien qieghed isuq
http://d1iqv7n2byhhzd.cloudfront.net/rome/kermit-rome-22.jpg
Jew forsi marru piknik?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjznfKWX-7Q
Le, gew xalata ma’ l-istazzjon tas-sena.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HKaMEjyjI0
http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll306/imagner/235_3536-1.jpg
Funny, any article about Consie seems to reap a lot of comments. It’s the tip of an iceberg.
Daphne you could always claim that what you meant was “the back of a Ferrari” but inadvertently said “bus”: another case of mistaken identity.
[Daphne – Nice idea. And Ferraris are red, too.]
This is like deja-vu with Alfred Sant and the chicken jokes two years ago.
I will never be able to look at a bus again without thinking of Consuelo Herrera.
Pleasure to have you aboard Mr Crawford.
http://charlescrawford.biz/blog/help-my-first-daphnelanche
WIll the court now have to appoint an expert from the Public Transport Authority to confirm whether or not the Lady Magistrate looks like the back of a bus?