Lousy Father of the Year Award: Sting.
If I could teleport myself back through time, I’d rip his poster off my teenage bedroom wall. What a bastard. As though it’s not bad enough that he dumped the first two of those children – the ones he had by his first wife, Frances Tomelty – the youngest when she was just a few weeks old, to run off with Trudy Styler (with whom he had the next four).
Now he’s not even going to provide for them even though he’s worth 180 million pounds. Is he going to give it all to charitable causes and foundations, like Warren Buffet (bad enough – because you can leave the bulk to charity while making sure your children are sorted for life too, at that level, unless you wish to make a malicious and selfish point).
No, he is not. He is not going to provide for his children because he and Trudy Styler are spending it all.
He said in a magazine interview: “I told them there won’t be much money left because we are spending it! We have a lot of commitments. What comes in, we spend, and there isn’t much left. I certainly don’t want to leave them trust funds that are albatrosses round their necks. They have to work. All my kids know that and they rarely ask me for anything, which I really respect and appreciate.”
Ah, but do they respect and appreciate him – that is the question.
If he really thinks that lots of money is more of an albatross round a person’s neck than lots of bills and lots of struggle to pay them, then he should practise what he preaches. He seems to be fine with having lots of money himself – doesn’t see it as much of an albatross round his neck. He enjoys it so much that he’s not going to leave his children a red cent.
And it’s going to be so much worse for his children than for anybody else, except perhaps Warren Buffet’s. In addition to having to work, which lots of people tend to do anyway whether they ‘need’ to or not because work is not just about money, they are going to have to contend with a lifetime of everybody assuming that they are rolling because they’re Sting’s children, and all the inherent problems those assumptions bring with them.
He knows that himself, because he said in the interview: “People make assumptions; that they were born with a silver spoon in their mouth, but they have not been given a lot.”
One of the reasons is that he has the most incredibly pushy and acquisitive wife, who grew up in miserable poverty and who has spent the last 32 years using her husband’s earnings to eradicate all that. These two OAPS have six incredible ‘homes’ and a staff of 100. But they have given their children – they have four of those six children in common – nothing. And they boast about it, and present it as something positive that they are doing for their children’s sake.
You’d think Styler would look out for her four children at least, but no – not unless she’s squirrelling it away without their father’s knowledge. But from what I’ve read about her, including her own statements in magazine interviews, it looks like she is the driving force behind all that conspicuous consumption.
Let’s face it: men left to their own devices do not think of buying many whack-off homes in the world’s most expensive hot-spots and stuffing them full of servants in uniform in a reprise of a pre-World War I way of life. They are happiest with one comfortable pad and their idea of conspicuous consumption is fitting it out with technology and gadgetry and maybe lots of cars and bikes in the huge garage.
What awful people, honestly. The natural human compulsion is to want your children to benefit, either in your lifetime or after your death, from your hard work. The purpose of draconian inheritance taxes was (and is, where they still exist) to ensure that this natural human compulsion is thwarted as far as possible.
Mr and Mrs Sting’s six homes clearly give them far more pleasure than their six children.
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http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/sting-tells-his-children-they-wont-receive-much-from-his-180million-fortune-because-he-wants-to-spend-it-all-9555973.html
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2011/oct/09/barabara-ellen-trudie-styler-big-issue
Dear Daphne, I usually agree with practically all you say but I cannot agree with you on this one. Sting made his millions because he worked for them, he earned them and he deserved them. He believes that if his children want to build their lives, they have to do it themselves. My father made me work my butt off for what I own today. He could have easily given it to me (and I’m not saying this to boast). The road was tough but thanks to his principles and his beliefs, I can honestly say that I’m a self-made man. If he chooses to give me his wealth after his death, it is welcome but until then, I’ll make my own living.
I had the same reaction when I first read this. Enjoying the fruit of one’s labour’s is fine. However, setting an objective to spend it all and not leave anything to one’s offspring is perverse.
In Warren Buffet’s (and Bill Gates’) case, I believe that he had indicated that he would leave his children tidy sums to ensure that they would not want, but the excess would go to charity.
I would generally not see anything wrong with parents giving their children an education and then letting them stand on their own two feet. Perhaps if more parents did this, there would be a new upcoming and much needed generation of level-head people with a backbone, who know the cost as well as the value of everything and who might turn out to have a better and more balanced perspective in a world that has long since gone mad.
Of course, I speak mainly of the working and middle classes, where money is hard earned by the sweat of one’s brow or through academic or professional accomplishments, and where there is some wealth, but not in obscene amounts.
The situation of Sting is indeed different. Had the children have been left to their own devices after being given all the necessary tools to do so, this would not necessarily be a bad thing. What is indeed upsetting is that with his net worth, Sting and wife are burning through it like locusts on a rampage, living life in an extravagant manner that is not only outdated, but verges on improper. One would be justified in expecting Sting to show a bit more soul than that.
I have never idolised anyone (unlike my siblings whose walls were full of posters). Perhaps it is because I belong to a later generation than theirs. At a young age, I had already figured out that famous people such as singers, actors and politicians amongst others are somewhat fickle in nature, purporting themselves as something other than what they really are as part of their money-making, vote-grabbing, self-promoting marketing techniques. They chose to appeal to their niche markets with their words and music, often forgetting to do so with their actions. Or at best, they make liaisons, that can twist and distort even the very few, who may have set out with nothing but the best of intent.
One can never be too disappointed by stories like this when any polished public persona reveals himself to be an ugly, distorted being who will not rest until he has, quite literally, consumed himself. At most, we should be disappointed with ourselves for having had higher expectations.
Six million out of 180 million (3% of his worth) would be enough for that tight-arse to set up his children for life, and he can spend the other 174 million on whatever he wants.
One million for each of his offspring hardly seems enough! You’re not much better than he is – sorry, but anything less than 10 million each is too little.
You can adopt me
You miss my point. If it were up to me I’d give them much more than 10m each right away, and let them divide the rest equally when I’m gone.
What I am saying is that even if one is a scrooge or spendthrift with one’s own money, 6m out of 180m is hardly going to be noticed is it?
At least he and his wife realize that they can’t take their fortune anywhere with them when their time runs out.
That, however, has not made them any less selfish.
My question, furthermore, is whether he plans to ‘sail away’ from this world on the same day as his ‘lady Macbeth’ wife.
I would rather think that she herself is definitely not looking forward to that event.
The mother of all iced buns.
http://www.independent.com.mt/articles/2014-06-30/news/the-pembroke-land-grab-5652348933/
So now they DO have to put on the red light.
Maybe he is planning to buy 180 Maltese passports
It depends on when and how he dies.
He’s assuming he’ll die of old age after living the life and spending it all. But what if he happens to die today?
Peter Sellers was another celebrity who left his children a pittance.
Hawn min ma jsibx flus biex jaghmel lunch ghal uliedu ghal l-iskola, jew ghal l-uniformi jew stationery, lanqas mill-childrens allowance li suppost jintefqu ghat-tfal biss. Imma ghall-hrug, ilbies, mobiles, hairdressers, sigaretti….ghandhom.
U mela sewwa jaghmel… mhux hu hadem ghalihom!
Gawdi mela, Sur Sting.
Guzeppi tal-Mosta
Kullhadd jafni!
I’m not in the least surprised. I know a person who is no rock star, and he is squandering his money and a lovely inheritance he never worked for, on sports cars and homes for himself and for his new woman, and a nice costly family home, while being cheered and egged on by that same woman who was never well off but found a gullible married man as a meal ticket.
Meanwhile, he gives his teenage son the odd 20 euros once in a while, yet thinks nothing of lavishing his money on a girlfriend who is not working, unless you can consider the gestation of a child produced to secure her place in his life and his money ‘work’.
How difficult it seems to be for men to remember that their children should remain the top priority in their lives even when they no longer live with the mother. When was the last time you heard about a woman who put her boyfriend’s interests, financial and emotional, before her children’s of whatever age? Or a woman who cheated her children of their rightful inheritance to benefit her new husband instead? But men do this all the time.
The mistake women usually make is to set themselves up with male leeches who latch onto them because they are hardworking and ask for little or nothing. Men like this run a mile from the women I’ve described above – the ones who expect to be kept and provided for.
But I have to say that I know men who have undertaken the task of bringing up their children themselves because their wives have run off. They have my full praise and admiration because they do a sterling job sacrificing their social life so as to keep the children stable and happy.
When the guy went all pseudo-environmental in the late 80s I immediately saw through him. Should have done it earlier, I admit – that fake Jamaican accent on ‘De-do-do-do’ was a warning.
Self-centred , tight -arsed, big- mouthed prick. This old geyser has not realised that at the end of the day it will be his kids who will be in a position to chose the old folks’ home where he will be put out for pasture in his dotage.
FU Sting. Hope you croak before you get to spend them.
Wow what a miser. I’d hate to be one of his children.
And how cosy is MEPA nowadays?
http://www.independent.com.mt/articles/2014-06-30/news/from-san-blas-to-qala-developer-turns-mepa-refusal-into-fast-track-permit-5669126144/
The problem with these people is that to produce anything they just have to destroy everything first.
It’s their style that’s wrong. Impossibly so.
http://www.independent.com.mt/articles/2014-06-30/news/ngos-claim-abuse-at-san-blas-was-ignored-by-mepa-5670535169/
Why are we surprised with such selfishness and hypocrisy?
Times of Malta reports a tragedy: 30 migrants were found dead on a boat near Sicily. 9 out of 17 commentators explicitly urge pushback. Corinne Vella correctly notes that pushback is illegal.
Two replies to Ms Vella’s comment deserve noting for their perverse stupidity and selfishness:
“Push back is the way forward, if its ileagal how come Australia has pushed all boats back since 19/12/2013!! Not one single trip has been successful they were all turned back to Indonesia.”
“Pushback is only illegal whilst Malta is a signatory to the Human Rights Convention. All we need to do is suspend it or else scrap it. Australia enforces push backs.”
http://www.timesofmalta.com/articles/view/20140630/local/30-migrants-found-dead-on-boat-near-sicily.525687
Kevin
What is your solution for these large number of illegal immigrants entering Malta? It is unsustainable for Malta to keep them.
They should do something in their countries, in the case of Syrians and Christian Arabs , these should be offered asylum.
Why make a special case of Syrians and Christian Arabs?
My solution, P, certainly does not hinge on in humane treatment or infringement of a person’s fundamental right to freedom, to have work, to live safely and securely, to exist in peace away from political, economic, and criminal strife.
Pushback is a racially charged, ignorant, inhuman, and cowardly solution. Do not give me the unsustainability argument. Do not insult my intelligence. Refugees are unsustainable only if they do not contribute in any way to the country in the long term.
The real problem stems from people like you who are a divisive influence. You a inadvertently segregating these migrants and making damn sure that both sides will take a hard line and militant stand against each other. Fundamentalism starts here.
Kevin, go and tell the British this and they had fewer illegal immigrants per capita of the Maltese population.
Strain on health, housing and policing is evident in the UK because of immigration.
P, do not flaunt your ignorance about the British situation where a nanny state exists which encourages laziness among all and sundry. Strain on health, housing and policing is not a result of immigration. That is an effect. The cause is a very generous nanny state.
Profound ignorance is frightening. Those people are calling for the abolition of their own rights.
Yes, my sentiments exactly, Corinne. Instead of calling for a solution that consolidates and improves everyone’s treatment as an individual with rights, they prefer losing their own. Why? Because these immigrants are black.
I don’t think they even know they’re calling for the denial of their own rights. That is why I said profound ignorance is frightening.
Imbaghad probabbli jinharaq jekk tghidlu li mhux ha tixtrilhu xi album imma li se tiddownloadjah… bil-mod, ja buffu.
Dear Daphne
Nobody owns anybody a living ! Sadly many illegal immigrants are thinking that we living in Europe owe them a living. It seems that they did not heed Obama`s words when he told Africa that it should stop blaming the white race and pull up its socks! I know you will surely not agree with this but I wanted to share :-) Keep up the good work!
If immigrants think “we” owe them a living, why are you afraid that immigrants will “steal” ‘our’ jobs?
Sting’s new name – Stingy.
Kids do not ask to be born or decide to whom they want to be born to.
The least good and humane parents should do is where possible leave them a little something to help them get on with their lives. It is good to think of helping those less fortunate. However charity begins at home.
Sting is an unnatural father with as much paternal instinct as a crocodile with the withdrawal symptoms of Viagra.